Spencer Knew It All Along
by Oceanmistsupporter
Summary: We can't deny it. Spencer seemed to know something about Seddie from the moment iCarly started. This is Spencer's thoughts and feelings towards Seddie, and he can proudly say, "I KNEW IT!" Complete, utter Seddie. Rated T.
1. Chapter 1: Before iCarly Starts

**(A/N: This will go through all of the Seddie moments in iCarly through Spencer's words. Who can deny that Spencer always seemed to know something about Seddie? You know he did. So this is him thinking about Seddie all the way from when they were twelve to when they were seventeen. Also, the point of this is to kind of have an unreliable narrator look at Seddie through his point of view, so expect some lies and some denial as well as many, many, many opinions.)**

Look, I've never been one to probe relationships. It's a relationship, for God's sake! It's love between two people. If the relationship has nothing to do with me, then why would I bother looking through it?

But I'm a twenty-four year old guy, young, still searching for love. I've had plenty of relationships myself but I'm currently single. I must say, I am a catch though. Adventurous, successful, charming, even has a sensitive side because he took in his thirteen year old sister when their dad left. So when it came to love, I worried about myself mostly, and like I said, did not probe other relationships. Especially ones where the people are _underaged._

I guess I had reason to care about who Carly dates. She's only twelve, for God's sake! And she's already a little magnet. I remember, trust me, I was quite the ladies' man when I was a kid. I still am, actually! It's understandable, I mean, _look at me!_ Anywho, she keeps her own little relationships to herself, and when I probe her life, it's because I'm her older brother and her legal guardian.

So, one day, I noticed that the Walkers had moved out from the apartment next to us. Awh, bummer, they always had a friend come over who was about my age and really hot...

Then I found out that a family of two was moving in. A single mother, age twenty-five, and her son. _Not married. _Oh God, this should be good! Heh, I'm not gonna lie.

But I soon learned that they are the opposite of what I imagined. The twenty-five year old actually looked to be ten years older, and her child was not an infant or a toddler. He was actually twelve, just as Carly was, with both of them being in sixth grade.

The mother's name was Marissa, and I tried to project the friendly, loyal neighbor type. But she projected the crazy physcho weirdo type. At first, I honestly thought it was all a joke. She greeted me by asking if I had any sharp objects that could possibly damage her son, who's name was Freddie. I said no, and she then proceeded to give me a full body inspection.

Freddie, on the other hand, was shyer and kept to himself. He hadn't met Carly yet (she wasn't home when they offically moved in) so I told Carly to go over there and introduce herself. She did, and she told me that they really hit it off. She says that Freddie really seemed to enjoy her company.

That, of course is all fine and dandy, and I thought nothing of it at all until a few weeks later, Carly ran down the stairs and says, _"Spencer, Spencer! We have an emergency!"_

I dropped my frying pan and proceeded to set the rug on fire. After dousing it with a pitcher of lemonade, I told her to calm down and we sat on the couch together. I then said, "Okay, what's wrong?"

_"Freddie just told me he loves me!"_ She screams.

Okay, they were twelve. Did I know love at twelve? No, but I sure was advanced at that age. Trust me. I was very, very, very advanced. I actually-

No, I won't get into that. But Carly needed some guidence right now, so I say, "Well, do you like him back?"

"Honestly..." She says warily. "No. Not really."

"Then tell him you want to stay friends." I say, then stand up and walk away. I don't see why Carly couldn't figure that out.

"But what if I hurt his feelings?" Carly says.

"Then you hurt his feelings." I say bluntly. Well, what could I say? I'm no master at relationships. At all!

Carly did wind up turning Freddie down. Very surprisenly, the turn-down didn't bother Freddie at all. He still liked her, still wanted to be her friend, and still wanted to get with her. It was almost a little disturbing, watching Freddie throw himself at Carly, because it reminded me of this girl I used to have a crush on in fifth grade. Her name was Alexis, and I asked her on a date, and she humiliated me in front of the whole class. So, watching Freddie continousely trying was almost bringing back tramatic experiences. Oh well. What do I know?

But of course, Carly cared enough about Freddie to make sure he never met _Sam Puckett._

Sam Puckett, since she was in 2nd grade, has become one of those everyday hassles that I have to deal with. Similar to when you lose your keys down the bathtub drain. Or when all of your school papers fall in the mud. She's just a daily chore you must get through, and there's no problem with that.

Of course, Sam has a deeper side than just the constant fighting and hair-pulling and cruel, abrasive behavior. She actually has managed to show a soft side to me and Carly over the years, but of course, these moments are _very_ rare and they don't last long at all. But I think I've started to understand Sam recently. I understand why she constantly comes over and constantlys eat our food. It's because her mom hardly provides for her, her father _never _provides for her, and although she's promised a roof over her head and food to eat...it's half-assed, quite frankly. So naturally she comes here. To survive.

Anyway, one day, Carly and Freddie were studying for their science exam in the apartment together. And then the door slams open, and a whirl of dirty blonde girls and electric blue eyes storms in.

Samantha Joy Puckett.

"Hi Sam!" Carly says immediately to her best friend.

"Oh, so this is Sam?" Freddie says. I could hear the bit of estatic in his voice. He probably imagines that he _really_ lucked out with Carly; she was pretty, kind, caring... And now she has an equally attractive friend? Well, even though they were both pretty, Sam and Carly were pretty in different ways. Carly _always_ wore girly clothes and skirts and what not. Sam looked just as good wearing baggy jeans, a green jacket that was too big for her, and her long curls dangling everywhere. Besides her disheveled appearance and her furious looking demeanor, Freddie thought he lucked out yet again.

Sam eyes Freddie up and down, her eyebrows lifting. "So _this_ is the kid Carly keeps talking about." She says evenly. Oh God, this was about to explode _really fast._

"Um, yes. My name's Freddie." Still not realizing the danger he was in, Freddie holds out his hand. Sam looks at the hand, then back at Freddie, then back at his hand. She lifts her own hand, spits in it, and before Freddie could pull away, and grips his hand with the inside of her palm and shakes it roughly.

The look on Freddie's face changed from friendly and kind to horrified and disgusted. While Carly looked horrified as well, I gave a little chuckle. Oh, what was Freddie thinking, charging up to Sam like that? Well, he learned his lesson, I must say.

But still, the encounter got into my head. I then proceeded that night to videochat with Socko. He decided to tell him how funny it was when Sam and Freddie met up, because Socko already knew Sam and I described Freddie to him before.

"Kinda sounds like my cousin's friend." Socko chuckles.

"What cousin? The one that works with young horses?" I say.

"Yeah, Colton." **(A/N: Get the joke? Colt=young male horse)** Socko says. "Anyhow, he had this friend, Logan, and I met him before. Anyway, this Logan kid would constantly complain about how much he hated this nerdy girl...what was her name? Quinn? I think that's it. Anyhow, by the end of their senior year, they were together."

I thought about his words even after I went to bed. Love-hate relationships were always one of my favorite stories in highschool. I believed it when I saw people who were sworn enemies suddenly getting together. But Sam and Freddie were only twelve; what did they know about love?

I stop.

I don't do this usually, I swear.

Trust me.

I don't probe.


	2. Chapter 2: iLike Freddie, iHate Sam's BF

So, me, the completely non-probing Spencer Shay watched a whole year of Sam and Freddie bickering. It became an usual thing, actually, watching the two scramble for each others' throats. So, for a year, I ignored the two. What business were they of mine, anyhow?

I tried to be involved in Carly's life as much as I could. But I was busy. I mean, I was a stay-at-home artist! You know how much _effort_that takes? Anyway, I started getting more involved in her life when she announced that she was making a web show.

A web show? What does she expect to succeed with a web show? Who would watch it? What could a couple of plucky thirteen year olds say or do that would be so entertaining that they could sustain an actual web show?

Somehow, they earn success quickly. At about that time I checked out of the situation and went back to watching not-so-clean videos on the internet. But they asked for my help frequently, and I tried to give it to them.

Even though they now all have a hobby in common, it did not stop the fighting between the blonde and the brunette. Carly and I began to ignore them, honestly, because we both knew that any kind of friendship development between the two won't happen for a very, very long time. Or at least I knew it.

One time, I was attempting to help Carly with iCarly stuff. They were trying to find dance videos, and I thought it was a _perfect_ chance to show off my beastly dance moves. Because I can dance. Trust me. I even invented my own dance, the _Firecracker._

As I was looking for my special helmet (trust me...I need it in case my explosions of floppy passion cause me to fall) and I walk from my room to the bathroom to see if I was bathing with my helmet one day and forgot. As I walked past, I heard the following dialogue.

Freddie must of agreed with Carly's score of the dancer, and I heard Sam say: "Weird you'd agree with Carly."

For once, Freddie didn't snap back with annoyance or fury. It was more of a weirded out kind of way as he says, "Weird you'd say that..."

This kind of made me arch my eyebrows. Sam surprisenly does not respond to that. They go back to watching dance videos as if nothing had happened at all.

I don't know what to make of this, but there is an inner fangirl inside of me saying, _You know you're not surprised._

The inner fangirl inside of me only grew louder a little while later, after I had been digging through my stuff only to find _no helmet_ again, I caught another glimpse of the two. Carly was simply watching the dance videos, but Sam and Freddie were practically asleep. Well, yes, practically asleep, but they were also lying against each other. Sam's head was fallen on Freddie's shoulder, and Freddie looked completely comfortable.

Of course, like all of their sudden moments, it ends when they realize what they are doing and they pull away from each other, exchanging awkward glances.

My suspicions were actually continuing to grow. Even as I walked away again, I could feel the corners of my mouth tilting up in a smile.

I kind of remember Carly telling me that Freddie has never had a girlfriend. Carly's been in a relationship twice or three times I believe, Sam was in a relationship once...that was it. The whole dating game in seventh grade is so cruel and humiliating. I am so glad I managed to get through middle school.

But then Carly tells me they found a girlfriend on the internet for Freddie. While I know I should sit the three down and explain to them to not trust people on the internet, she explains that they videochatted with this girl, and that she lives in Seattle.

Okay, okay. So Freddie is going to have this date at my apartment. I think it's kind of odd that Freddie and Sam have my apartment their second home, but I don't question it. Anyway, right before Valerie (the girl's name) comes here, Freddie asks me a question once we're alone. "Spencer...can I talk to you seriously for a few minutes?"

"Need a little first date advice?" I answer back. I blink in sympathy at this poor kid. Puberty has not been kind on his poor body, and he's already awkward enough. He'll need some help.

"Wouldn't hurt, I'm a little nervous." He answers, his round brown eyes wide.

"Just be yourself." Is the first thing I say. But here's the thing. I'm not even _thinking_ of Valerie. For some reason, the picture of the blonde-headed terror flashes in my mind, and as I keep talking to Freddie about this, it won't go away. I tell him some more details about how you should just stare into the girl's eyes and say nothing, and how they hypnotizes them. It's worked for me several times, I must admit. I even demonstrated it for him.

But Freddie and Valerie's couplehood only lasted a week before they realized Valerie was just using Freddie. Guess who Valerie ran to in order to get her own web show running? That's right, Sam. I don't know why this was...maybe there's a deeper reason...but what do I know? I'm not Valerie.

Surprisingly, Freddie wasn't so bothered by the break-up. Yet again, I don't know. Maybe it was because he knew getting used was bad? Maybe it was because of Carly?

Or was it because of someone else?

But, like Freddie, Sam gained her own little romance of her own. With some kid named Jonah. Taking one look at Jonah completely convinced me that someday I will see his name in headlines saying, Youth Committed Felony: Have You Seen Me? Of course, Sam wasn't far from there either, so there end lies the perspective.

And yet again, like Freddie, Sam was only being used. But this time, it was to get closer to Carly. It's sickening to see the future delinquent have interest in my sister, but it's even more horrifying to think that someone would really use Sam that way. Sure, Sam may be abrasive and violent, but she's fun and excitable and pretty and charming. Take it for what it's worth.

They think I didn't see them.

They thought I was blind.

They didn't think I saw the little exchange between the two. It was right after Carly had shown me that they were _still_ wedgie-bouncing Jonah. Carly ran upstairs for a bit and I followed her. She claimed she wanted to show me something. While she was looking for it, I walked back downstairs for a sec to grab a drink. I then saw Sam and Freddie talking.

"Hey," Freddie says to her.

Sam looks blankly at him, making a little hand motion. "Huh?"

"You gonna be alright?" Freddie asks her.

Sam shrugs. "Yeah." she says, half-assed. "At least we got revenge."

Freddie looks at her. "You know, revenge isn't the most important thing in the world."

"Oh, and what is?" Sam snaps back.

Freddie just shrugs. A few moments later, he says, "So I guess we were both used."

Sam looks at him.

"You know," Freddie says. "Me and Valerie. You and Jonah. Both of them were just using us for one thing."

"Yeah, well that's a way to look at it." Sam says with a half-smirk.

"I didn't pine for revenge, though." Freddie tells her.

Sam blinks. I think she was realizing that he's correct. "But why?" She asks.

"Revenge is worthless." He steps closer to her. "Someone hurts you, and then you hurt them back. You think it's to cancel out the issue, but what really happens? Now you both have permanent scars."

"Well, if you don't seek revenge..." Sam says. "How are we supposed to heal the scars they give us?"

"There are other ways." Freddie says softly.

My hand, which was now sweating from anticipation, causes me to slip and fall down the stairs. Both Freddie and Sam rush to my aid. "Are you okay?" they ask.

In my mind, I'm screaming, _No! No! Awh, God damn, that was so bittersweet!_ But I say, "Yeah, fine. Just fine."

Carly comes downstairs to make sure I'm okay. Yes, yes, I'm fine. _Now, Sam and Freddie, get back to your cute moment!_

But they don't. And I'm furious with myself for ruining it.


	3. Chapter 3: iSaw Him First, iKiss

The "Seddie" (I invented the word "Seddie" by the way. It means S/am X F/reddie. Clever, right? Right? No?) hints that happened during the past year were too small and unnoticeable for me to take interest in, except for the couple I already mentioned. Before I knew it, the gang was heading to their last year of middle school.

Any who, I was actually a little bit amazed by the three's development.

Both Carly and Sam were looking a bit too...advanced...for my liking, but Freddie actually made my eyes widen. Puberty finally decided, "You know what? We were so cruel to that Freddie kid. Let's give him a boost." No longer did he look so pathetic. His voice deepened, he got taller so now he was finally taller that both Carly and Sam, and he was just looking...not as dweeby. Good for him, right? He's still an AV club nerd, but that's irrelevant.

But...he continues to throw himself at Carly. It's almost vomit-causing. I don't know how much more of it I can take. It's not because she's my sister...I don't know why. Freddie is a great guy. Shouldn't I want Carly to be with someone like Freddie? Someone who would take care of her? Of course...but watching my sister constantly put the little guy down made me think otherwise.

There was some kind of big deal with some guy named Shane. I remember meeting him shortly. He fell down my elevator shaft...heh...I hope the guy doesn't sue. Anyway, after we got back from the hospital, Carly went upstairs and Freddie went to his own apartment. Sam says to Carly, "Can I stay the night?"

"Sure." Carly says as she goes upstairs.

Sam sets her purse/bag down on my couch and sighs.

"What's wrong, kiddo?" I ask her as I sip my iced tea.

"Carly just told me she kissed Shane while he was unconscious." Sam rolls her eyes, her mascara-whipped eyelashes lifting up. Another thing: when did Sam start wearing make-up? Both her and Freddie were getting really advanced...

"You both put Shane in a hospital." I say snarkily. "I think he'll distance himself away from you two. I wouldn't worry about it."

"It's not that." Sam says wiry. "It's...something else."

"What's up?" I ask her, walking over.

"It's nothing." She says, sitting down on the couch and resting her chin on her hand.

I glance to the stairs, and sit down beside Sam. "Carly's still upstairs."

Sam doesn't respond.

"Come on." I say. "You can tell me." I shake her knee, trying to give off the brotherly vibe.

"Promise you won't tell?" Sam says.

"Promise." Spencer responds.

She looks both ways, and then says, "I haven't kissed anyone before."

I blink. "So?" is the first thing that comes to my lips. I mean, I kissed a girl when I was eleven. But who cares how old you are before you kiss someone? What does it matter?

"So?" Sam echoes. "If anyone found out, I'd be branded a loser."

"A lot of people your age haven't kissed anyone yet." Spencer says.

"No, no, no." Sam says hastily. "Don't try to make me feel better. It's humiliating and God-awful. Just forget I said anything."

"But Sam-"

"Forget it, Spencer. I'm fine."

I'm a little upset that Sam's so bothered by this, but at least she's not dating and making out with delinquents. It's funny, I don't have to worry about Carly dating bad guys. She only seemed to like good guys. The only time it got kind of shaky is when she nearly dated this guy, Jake, when she was in 7th grade. Of course, heh, this guy was a _senior._ So it was kind of odd and a bit wary.

Now that Carly and Sam were fourteen and almost to highschool, it will be even harder to protect _both_ of my little sisters from the dating game.

Still, I shrugged this off. After I literally wasted an entire two weeks playing _the best game in the world_ (Pacrat, of course) I learned that Sam ever-so-deviously has been pranking Freddie. She tricked him several times, something about "Consuela's revenge". Any who, but here's the thing: Freddie got back at her! He pranked her by saying some hot guy wanted to meet up!

Now, that's a bit amusing, but it's also an eyebrow-raiser. Freddie being _devious?_ What happened to the shy, submissive Freddie? He practically showed her up in her own game.

I was blinking in confusion but it kind of makes sense. Whether Seddie had anything to do with this or not, Freddie has certainly developed some backbone for our blonde friend.

Hmm.

But then something odd happened. It was just an average day. I had already set two things on fire today, so nothing outof the ordinary. But later that night, Carly told me something.

"Sam ruined Freddie's life." She growls.

"How?" I ask.

"She totally humiliated him in front of thousands of people on iCarly." Carly says.

"How so?"

"She told iCarly live that Freddie never kissed anyone."

I stop.

_But, she hasn't kissed anyone either._

I would've usually lost respect for Sam, but I know this is some kind of physiological thing going through Sam's head. In a way, it's like she's insulting herself when she did it to Freddie. Of course, it's no excuse to bring on the pain to Freddie, but...

Wait. That was a good point.

The fact that the pain is brought onto Freddie is a little suspicious. Something about it is like one of those things that electrifies deep in your mind. Something that if you went searching for in your mind, you will end up curled in a ball naked in the shower biting your knees. Wishing you were dead kind of searching.

Sam never deals with pain head on like you're supposed to. She brings it to other people. And in this case, it was Freddie. But...that's...just...so...

About a week passes. Freddie has not shown up at our apartment. Sam did a couple times but Carly claimed she had a ton of homework to do and couldn't hang out. It was awkward and a little worrying. So this is it? This is where Seddie ends.

Oh.

If only I knew it was just the beginning.

Suddenly, one day, both of them came together. Carly told me that Sam apologized on iCarly, and that everything was cool between Sam and Freddie.

But no, everything was _not_ cool. For the first few days, I could literally cut the tension with a knife. Every time they so much as glanced at each other, they would whip their heads away. I could see it though, while Carly couldn't. Their cheeks were as bright as strawberries in the summertime.

Then, they incidentally brushed against each other. Literally, it was as if electricity flashed through them, and they leaped apart. They gave each other a look, and I know some secret message passed through their brown-to-blue eyes.

Something happened.

Something _had to_ have happened. They wouldn't be acting so jumpy if they simply made up. Something big happened, and they are hiding something. Hiding it from me.

I don't know what happened.

But I need to know.

I'm Spencer Shay, for God's sake! I guessed Seddie before anyone else did! I have the right to know, far more than anyone else did! Probably more than Sam and Freddie did, anyway!

I will know.

I don't probe; you know.

But I don't care.

I will know.


	4. Chapter 4: iReunite With Missy

Spencer Shay.

Pro artist.

Not only do I draw like a _god,_ but I also went to Law school.

The time length that I attended Law school however is irrelevant.

But not only do I draw like a _god_ and I went to Law school, I am also a certified detective.

...

Okay, not certified. But I was determined to learn the truth of Seddie. Look, something happened that night and it's clear that they haven't told anyone. But, alas, I _will_ find out. I can guarantee it.

Sam and Freddie have gone back to treating each other horribly. It was almost a little heartbreaking. Even as they fought and bit and smacked and wrestled and attempted to break bones, I still watched with open curiosity.

I watched as Sam set up her own website, and Freddie helped her with the little details. I then watched again as Sam pushed Freddie over the edge, abusing him by making him constantly repair details on her website for 50% of profit money. Then of course, Freddie, who couldn't take it anymore, ripped up the contract, only to find out that Sam gained one thousand dollars for the little website and kept it all for herself. Although I do believe that she gave Freddie a few dollars for a bagel.

See, that's the thing. Sam Joy Puckett is one of those mastermind forces that will make your head throb if you dare cross her path. Although she seeks out Freddie and brings the pain on him, he can easily get away if he wanted to. I mean, how hard is it to just start avoiding Sam? It's rather hard, I know, but surely it's possible. Still, Freddie seemingly lets it happen. He allows the extra stress.

Even after putting up with Sam for almost three years, Freddie still will not consider Sam as a friend. This is a little upsetting; I mean, I know that Sam is the opposite of her middle name. She's abrasive and crazy and will snap your neck if she gets the chance. But she's Sam, for God's sake. That's who she is. And apparently Freddie doesn't except that.

But still, I left the subject alone because _I don't probe_, but as always, it has its own little way of sneaking up on me again. I was cleaning around the house when I heard Freddie say from outside my door, "Maybe Carly's right. Maybe you're just jealous of Missy!" His voice sounded harsh and accusing.

"Okay, just...forget it." Sam didn't sound angry. She sounded more hopeless and sad. Like a lost puppy abandoned on Mars. "...don't believe me." I could hear the blonde walking away. My eye quickly runs up to the peephole, watching the whole scene.

Sam was almost out of view before Freddie yells, "Tell me one reason why I should believe you!"

I can see Sam turn back. Still, she seems calm yet heartbroken. "Because I came here." She says simply. "Have I ever come to you for help before? For anything?" She leaves without another word.

Freddie just stares after her, trying to get his thoughts in order. Once Sam had left, he just sighs and attempts to open his door. Of course, he managed to lock himself out. After screaming out "Butter!" in fury, he slumps down against his door, still glancing at where Sam left.

Hmm...

I think I'll intervene.

I open the door. "Hey, kid." I say in a friendly way. "Lock yourself out?"

"Yeah, I have to wait a few hours before my mom gets home." Freddie replies angrily.

"Here," I say. I hold open my own door. "Come inside."

"Thanks." The brunette found no harm in this. But in reality, I was luring him into a trap. Once inside, I slowly close the door.

"Any problems going on?" I ask him.

Freddie just shrugs. "Well...yeah, kind of."

"What's on your mind?" I pour myself a glass of lemonade. I never really noticed this, but I was beginning to see that in tense moments I seem to be drinking something. Distracts my mind a bit.

Freddie shrugs again. "Ehh, Sam seems to think that Missy's trying to replace her with herself."

"So you think Missy's out to get Sam?" I ask. I remember Missy from when I was younger. I was eighteen when I started looking after Carly, and that's when Carly stopped hanging with Missy because we moved to Seattle. No matter.

"Yeah, but come on." Freddie says. "That's a little...ridiculous, isn't it?"

"You tell me, Freddie." I say simply. "Sam may be paranoid, but she wouldn't start making up lies." I brush my thick, long dark hair out of my eyes. "Sam may be the master of lying, but you know she doesn't."

"But it seems so..." Freddie groups for words to use.

"Trust your gut, I guess." I say, finishing up the conversation. "I guess this is a matter of whether or not you trust Sam."

He doesn't respond to that.

It turns out my talk seemed to affect Freddie's choice. The boy had the choice to go on the trip of a lifetime or save Sam and Carly's friendship. Technically, he and the choice between Sam's happiness and his own happiness. And guess what he chose?

Sam's.

So now, it is clear that Freddie loves Sam as a friend. Seddie friendship. Good for them.

But of course, Sam doesn't consider this at all and continues to go all out on him, especially when they have to share the locker "239". The most legendary locker. I remember craving it when I went to Ridgeway. Those lucky little broskis.

These little kids never cease to amaze me with their games of fighting and friendship. Secretly they love their friendship but they fight all the time. No wonder Freddie didn't use to consider Sam as his friend. She's more work than anyone we have ever met in our entire lives.

And yet he just keeps coming back.

They love their "game", but it causes them confusion, nausea, sadness, and endless, endless puzzles. In a way, thank God that they aren't into each other _yet._

Their game causes them enough depression as it is.

If it began to cause them heartbreak...

Then they might be in trouble.


	5. Chapter 5: iTwins

Spencer Shay, pro artist and detective, could care less about Seddie at the moment.

Because Spencer Shay is on a date with Cassandra Banks, and it's _great,_let me tell you.

Spencer Shay also likes talking in third person.

Any who, Seddie is the last thing on my mind when I'm with this girl. She's classical and funny and extremely hot. Did you know that some people call me a womanizer? That's one of the most outrageous things I've ever heard! Just because I've dated 20+ women, just because I was checking out the waitress on our date... I'm not one, okay?

Anyway, so I come home, feeling on top of the world. The next morning, everything is normal as I go to Hey Food! and back. But then...I realize that my own little sister, my flesh and blood, is tutoring Chuck Chambers.

Oh

My

Goddddddd!

This is probably one of the worst things that has ever happened to me, so now I have to dodge Chuck due to all of his deadly games. So now, I have more reason to not pay attention to Seddie.

One interesting tidbit, though, is that Sam's twin sister Melanie is in Seattle for a week or so. I haven't seen Melanie since 4th grade when she started going to border school. Sure, she's bright and smart, but the real reason she's in boarding school is because Pam Puckett knew she couldn't take care of two kids quickly becoming teenagers. So she saved Melanie rather than Sam because she knew Melanie would have a future, while Sam...

I'm totally cool with Melanie. She reminds me of Carly in a way. Carly could probably be in boarding school if she wanted, but she'd never leave her friends. Ah well.

I didn't spend much time with Melanie while she was visiting because I was too busy making sure _Chuck Chambers didn't kill me._ Carly and I managed to fix our problem with Chuck, about two days before Melanie left.

So, once I was free of him I was pretty happy again. Until something bad happened. I mean, _really_ bad.

I was lying on the couch, wallowing in self-pity when the door opened and Samantha Puckett stalks in. "Hey Spence," She greets. "Why so low?"

"Oh, you know." I say, glumly. "Maybe I just...love this couch."

"Come on." Sam sits on the table and leans into my face. "What's wrong?"

"It's nothing, okay?" I play with the soft fabric of my couch. "Why don't you go see what Freddie is up to?"

A little convenient that I mentioned Freddie, no?

Sam shifts backward and shrugs. "Nah, I'm here for you. Now tell me what's wrong."

"It's just..." I half-groan. "Cassandra cheated on me."

"She what!" Sam hisses, getting defensive. Another thing about Sam Puckett: She'll humiliate you and she'll beat you to a pulp with no problem. But if she says she has your back, she has your back.

"Don't worry about it." I brush my thick, long hair out of my eyes. "I can handle it."

"No, no." Sam snaps. "We gotta get back at this chick."

"How?" I look at her. "She already got me good enough."

Sam leans right into our face so our eyes were only inches apart. "With a little thing I like to call," she whispers. _"Revenge."_

"Revenge?" I echo. Look, I'm Spencer Shay. I can't lie, I can't hurt others. I still liked Cassandra. Why would I want to worsen this? "I don't think this is such a good idea-"

"Look," Sam says stiffly. "I'm already pissed enough. You and I, we can make this chick regret ever messing with you!"

"I'm not good with revenge!" I protest. "What can we do?"

"Just leave it to me." Sam says with an evil grin.

I get a call in the middle of the night. It's from Sam.

"The work is done." She says breathlessly.

"What?" I gasp.

"Get down to the lobby." She snickers. "This is great."

"O-Okay." I run downstairs, wearing only ducky boxers and a shirt that says, _I would buy you a drink, but I'm a miner_ with Steve from Minecraft on it. I rush downstairs and see Sam standing beside the stairs, her arms crossed over her chest and her mouth twisted in a demented grin. I see, in the middle of the lobby, Cassandra and the guy she cheated on me with fighting.

"So, I come home," The guy hisses at her. "And I see the place trashed, and used condoms everywhere! Explain!"

"I don't even know what you're talking about!" Cassandra pleads. "I went to bed and everything was normal! I don't know how it happened!"

"Well, you cheated on your last guy for me. So how do I know that you're not just doing to again!" He accuses.

"I-" Cassandra begins.

"Save it. I'm out of here." The guy storms out of Bushwell Plaza, leaving Cassandra heartbroken and confused.

"Come on, hurry!" Sam rushes me up the steps, and we shuffle into an elevator.

"That was mean." I lean against the wall to stay upright. "That was brutal. You shouldn't have done that."

"A little over-the-top, I know." Sam shrugs. "But I was pissed for other reasons, so I took it out on them."

"Where do you get used condoms anyway?" I shout. "Don't answer that!"

"Look, she broke your heart, so I got revenge for you!" Sam looks at me. "Was that wrong?"

"What upset you so badly that made you do this to her?" I ask her.

Sam looks away. "I'm pissed about Melanie, is' all."

"She's your sister." The elevator door opens to my apartment and we step into the room. "I know she annoys you, but still. She's family."

"Look, I get the family code." Sam mutters. "It's just..."

"What did she do, anyway?" I ask her as I stare at my fishbowl, incredibly thirsty.

"Oh...nothing in particular." Sam says awkwardly. "She's just...you know. Being Melanie."

"You sure?" I ask.

"Yep." Sam grips the table with her painted fingernails. "That's it. Nothing more."

I'm now kind of proud that I somewhat managed to get revenge on Cassandra. As I sit, decently content, with Carly, Sam, and Freddie, we start engaging in convo.

"When's Melanie going to be back in town?" Carly asks Sam.

"Probably not for a while. Thank God." Sam sits back and turns her head as far as she could from Freddie.

"Sorry I missed her visit." I say. "Anything interesting happen?"

Sam grips her red flip-phone very hard.

"Melanie and Freddie went on a date!" Carly pipes up.

God damn it Carly. Can't you see that this is tense enough?

"It was just casual!" Freddie rolls his eyes and looks over to Carly. "Nothing more!"

"But you two _kissed_!"

"She kissed me!"

"Oh, does it matter?" Sam snaps, and both of them fall silent. "Melanie's gone now, anyways. Let's just forget it!"

I give Sam a surprised, questioning look. I was a little hurt that she didn't tell me the true reason she was ticked at Melanie. Sam just gives me a brief glance, but she refuses to meet my eyes.

"Hmmm..." I say outloud, and both Sam and Freddie look at me. Sam looks pissed at me now, and Freddie has this slightly confused expression.

They don't know it themselves yet, but trust me, they will.


	6. Chapter 6: iThink They Kissed

My name is Spencer Shay, and I am dying.

Have you ever seen your life flash before your eyes? I just did. I saw images of my mother and my father, both beaming down at me, my friends, Carly being born with her dark hair and eyes, some images of the girls that meant the most to me, and finally ending with me falling to the floor. I craved oxygen as I squirmed for a moment.

I barely heard what the police man said, but I'm sure he's apologizing for the prisoner's reckless behavior. I know that when you have a near death experience, it can kind of make you feel loopy. Unconnected with reality. I know, it's a stretch.

It's been a while since Melanie left. The gang's in their freshmen year now. Freshmen. Fresh meat. I remember being a freshman. I remember getting punched in the shoulder every time this one junior would see me. How will they survive? I don't know if I'll survive today. You know, with crazy prisoners trying to kill me.

So, about that loopy feeling…I think it may have some depth behind it. Because I think I'm having the effects. I'm not sure… Maybe it was due to something else. Surely a bit of choking wouldn't trigger this?

What I just heard…

Must be due to some kind of thing I have eaten, not a near-death experience. I have ingested some pretty weird things in my lifetime. It's a wonder that I'm not dead yet. I must have done something, or ate something, that is creating hallucinations and causing illusions and morphing words.

Some hallucinations include unicorns trying to sell you weed, cats asking you why you killed Musfasa, Stitch coming out of nowhere and licking your face, THE DOG Island puppies asking you where the Sniff Master Metal and the Legendary Flower is, and even some rocks trying to teach you how to do the butternut trut. Only the most craziest things your mind can invent have a chance of surfacing in your hallucinations.

Case in point…

Carly says to me that Freddie and Sam kissed.

Yep. I've been smoking something.

She shocks me and first, screaming it out as soon as Sam is out of earshot. That's just how she is. The idea of Seddie has not crossed her mind. Not even once. Because Carly is one of those people that will take anything you give her. If you show her one picture of a cow with wings, and tell her that cows now have wings, she will believe it.

Okay, that's kind of dramatic, but something along the matter is true.

"No way!" I cough out now. I let my excitement flood over me until I'm unaware of anything else. "Give me the deets!"

Carly, in a shocked terror, manages to tell me that Sam told her when at the dentist. Under the influence of laughing gas, she says. My excitement fades. As Carly tells the story, it begins to seem more and more unlikely that it happened. Laughing gas is crazy. It can dumb you down until you have no idea what you're saying. I manage to calm Carly down with that theory.

Still, I have hope. I just calmed Carly down with that, but not me. I don't buy it. Sam must have been extremely drugged for that to work. And even so, it must mean that Sam was thinking about it.

I try to think of a scenario that would lead to Sam and Freddie kissing, but I honestly can't think of one. Huh.

I later find out that…

…it is true.

I found out that Carly managed to force the truth out of Freddie.

It's true.

I spent the rest of that day screaming into a pillow. It should be considered a wasted day—now the prisoners and I are behind on our pants project—but the feeling I had stayed with me. I hope I can cling onto it for the future.

It's true. How could it be true? I was such a firm believer in Seddie, and I still am. But when it is actually happening, right in front of my face, it's almost too much to handle. Too much to swallow.

I don't care.

I want to probe, but I don't. Carly gets a hold of them before I can. I later learn that she questioned the two, while they were all duct-taped by the prisoners. I won't get into their betrayal. It hurts too much.

She tells me what she learned. She learned that it happened once. Sam went to Freddie after admitting to the world that she never kissed anyone. For him, of course. They were both bummed out, and negotiated something out. Just one time. Eight seconds. Eight blissful seconds. Then she left his fire escape. And that's where they left it.

No wonder they looked so jumpy…

I want to scream into the pillow again, but I restrain.

"It's no big deal." Carly says. "They don't like each other or anything. They did it to get it over with."

Of course. That's what Carly thinks. That's what anyone who heard of the situation thinks. That's even what Sam and Freddie think.

Well guess what?

I don't buy it.

So, a day after this happens, I decide that Spencer Shay, pro artist and detective, is now going to upgrade to Spencer Shay, pro artist, detective, and _spy._

Not just a spy, either. I want answers, and I want them _now._ And I'm going to get them now. Watch me.

I set the bait, and wait, hidden, in the bottom cupboard. Even behind the door in the cramped, dark space, I hear the door open and I hear Sam say, "Spencer? You there?"

I hear the door close. "Spencer?" Sam calls. "Where are you?"

A few moments later, I hear the door open again. This time I hear Freddie's voice. "Spencer? Sam, what are you doing here?"

"Spencer told me to meet him here." I'm almost a little surprised by how Sam sounded. She sounded…civil. This is bringing up a discussion that I would love to ponder, but I need to focus on the situation at hand.

"Same here." I think Freddie is pulling out his phone. "He sent me a text saying that it was urgent."

"Same here!" I'm pretty sure they're comparing the texts now. "Should we wait for him to get here?"

"Alrighty." Freddie says. There's a bit of silence. Then finally Freddie says, "I wonder if there are any more prisoners inside there."

"That really messed up everything." Sam mutters. "We could have been well out of Washington."

"Yeah." Freddie agrees. "That was really low of her, asking us those kinds of questions."

"Especially if we liked it." Sam says, almost exasperated. "That was awful. I mean, I know she's curious, but it was over-the-top, you know?"

"Yeah…" Freddie says. I press my ear to the door, trying to absorb every bit of convo. There's silence again, then Freddie speaks again. "…Well?"

"Yes?" Sam says.

"We never answered her question." Was Freddie's only reply.

"No, we didn't." Sam replies slyly, trying to push it off, perhaps?

"Well, come on then!" I can hear Freddie pacing. Perhaps he's trying to push something off himself? Push away some _unwanted thoughts?_ I can tell by his confused tone that he's trying to figure something out, about himself. "There's no use pushing it off. Let's hear it."

"Hear what?" Sam asks, all too innocently.

"Enough of that." Freddie snaps. "Tell me the truth."

"Tell you what?" I can tell that Sam was glaring at Freddie.

"Did you like it—ow!" Freddie's question was followed by a pained cry. "What was that for?"

"What kind of question is that?" Sam spits out. "Who cares, you know?"

"I care." Freddie says with an edge on his voice.

"Because you're a hopeless romantic." Sam sneers. "You always have been. Now, c'mon, boy. Don't kid yourself. You would have much rather been kissing someone else, like Carly."

"But I didn't kiss Carly." Freddie says quietly. "I kissed you."

"As if you wanted to."

"If I didn't want to, I wouldn't have done it."

"But—" Sam was about to say something, but his words sunk in, and she fell silent.

"Now that you've shut up for a few moments, listen up. I guess you have a point, how it didn't matter. But it still happened, you know?" Freddie almost sounded downcast under the layer of confusion. "So you're willing to just forget it?"

"I didn't say that." Sam was trying hard to stay unmoved, but was struggling.

"So what do you suppose we do about this?" Freddie asks.

"We were cool before. Carly finding out won't make a difference." Sam sounded gentler now. "There's no need to worry."

Freddie sounded as if he was standing rigid. Silently. "You don't think?"

"Nope. I promise you, give a week and it'll all blow over. And we'll be right back to the way we were before." I can tell that Sam is trying to comfort him in her own way.

"Yeah, I g-guess you're right." Freddie sounded shaken.

"Look, I'm tired of waiting for Spencer. I'm gonna head down to the lobby and see if Lewbert has seen him. See you later." I hear Sam's voice fade away as the door opens and closes.

"Bye." Was Freddie's only reply.

I decide to risk a peek. I slowly but surely open the cupboard door carefully, and sneak one glance. Freddie's standing rigid beside my computer, looking more confused than ever. His brown eyes are trying to make out something in the empty air, but he is clearly failing. I think of calm, collected Freddie, who is indeed a hopeless romantic, standing in front of me. Oh, how ways have changed. If only he knew they were going to change, even more. For the better? That's up for discussion.

Freddie was just a boy who was watching the world around him change. If you were to give us all a test—me and Carly and Freddie and Sam—Freddie would be the least welcome to change. I don't blame him. Some people just can't handle it. The poor thing sitting in front of me doesn't know what to think, doesn't know whether or not to pursue his blonde friend.

Although he doesn't understand it, he stays there, trying to make sense of this. Sam just mindfucked the poor kid. Now what?

He doesn't know what to think. But surely, he must be relieved that everything will be back to normal. Isn't that what he wanted?

But judging by the confused, downcast face the boy had…

I think otherwise.


	7. Chapter 7: iSpeed Date, iSaved Your Life

My name is Spencer Shay, and I am confused.

We are also talking about the same Spencer Shay who worshipped a talking meatball, the same Spencer Shay that thought it was a wise idea to taste the assortment of fluids and materials that Chuck Chambers provided him with, the same Spencer Shay who is basically the King of Weirdness and bad ideas.

So, saying I'm confused is indeed saying something.

I have begun to notice that our little friend Freddie here is getting his "wish". I'm watching in amazement as Carly grows closer to Freddie. It really did happen all at once. Overnight, really. I'm just sitting here, observing Seddie, watching Carly turn down Freddie here, eating candy canes, when suddenly one day I find Sam shaking me awake in the middle of the night.

"What? What?" I gasp, flinging upward. In one hand I'm clinging a light saber from Galaxy Wars. In the other hand I'm holding a carton of milk. I'm in complete pajamas, duck themed of course, and clearly not ready for visitors.

But Sam stops for no one.

I'm confused because she's wearing a pretty dress and I'm pretty sure I'm dreaming. I'll have to smack myself later for even considering that I would be having this kind of themed dream about my blonde friend. Still, I realize I am not dreaming seconds later when Sam shakes me again.

"Spencer, it's me, Sam." A ray of moonlight that shown through the window was the only possible way that I could make her out. Oh, and my Galaxy Wars nightlight. "I need to talk to you."

I sit up, blinking, still half-asleep. I glance at the clock. It's eleven-thirty. "Come on. We only have a half an hour." Sam begs.

"Half an hour for what?" I mumble, still feeling the hazy, violet-tinted ribbons of sleep curling around me.

"I need to talk to you." Sam admits.

I tried to think, and then it hits me. "Wait. Tonight is the night of the Girl's Choice Dance. What are you doing here?"

"It's about that." She sits right next to my still-laying form and sighs. "Didn't go so well."

"What happened?" I ask, trying to blink the sleep out of my eyes.

"Well, Gibby was a pain. But that wasn't really the big deal. It's just…" Sam looks as if she was trying to make something out in the empty air. "I can't explain it."

I sit up now, as I start to become more fully awake. "Something troubling you?"

"Yes, there is." She says right off the bat. "But I can't figure out why."

"Let's hear it." I say.

"Well, this is what happened." Sam explains. "I was heading to the Groovy Smoothie, from Gib's house. I arrive there, and I see something…that I wasn't supposed to see."

Oh God. Oh no. I see this now. "Oh God." My eyes widen. "Look, I know we're friends, but I don't want to hear it! I don't want to be involved!" I press the pillow over my head. "Don't tell me if you witnessed a murder! I can't bear it!"

"Spencer, shut up!" Sam hisses at me. "Nothing like that!"

"Oh." I readjust myself. "Go on then."

"I just saw…Freddie and Carly dancing. They both had other dates that night, but they were nowhere to be seen. That's just it." Sam slumps against the other pillow, concentrating on something. "I don't understand why it unhinged me. It just did."

Now I'm trembling.

With excitement, of course.

I want to say something but I'm afraid that I might lose a hand. I decide, for the sake of Seddie, that I must say something. "Are you jea—"

"No, I am not. You know that. Don't be ridiculous." Sam narrows her eyes as she stares into space, as if trying to figure something out. "It's something different."

"What do you think it is?" I ask, now wide awake.

"It's just…" Sam blinks, as if confused herself. "If Carly and Freddie get together…it'll change everything."

"Change it?" I echo. "Well, that's true, I guess."

"I'm good with change. I'm fine with it. But this'll be a bad change, and I know it. Imagine it now. They would exclude me from everything. They'd pretend I never existed." Sam slumps her shoulders.

"You don't want to be forgotten?" I say gently. "Sam, Carly and Freddie love you. They'd never do that to you."

"I'm not saying I like to see Carly torture Freddie, it's just… I don't think they'd be good together." Sam finishes.

"Well, no matter what happens…" I say in the most brotherly way. "I know they would never abandon you. Trust me on this, okay?"

Sam looks up at me, and I saw her give a tiny half-smile. "Okay."

"I doubt anything will happen between Carly and Freddie, anyway." I say, curling back up under the covers. "If nothing happened already, then nothing's gonna happen later."

Well…then Freddie got hit by a car.

Hahaha. I feel bad for laughing, but that's a great way to start off the new subject.

In a matter of days, Sam turned from a confused little girl with a conflict to a raging killer who I am now having nightmares of. Every second of every waking day could be the day that Sam ends me. Just one swift paintball to my skin and I'm dead—_I'm dead!_

So, I'm just making some comfort food when the blondie whirls in, screaming for help. Such a low blow to attack me with a pizza in my possession. Surely she wants to end this now. I swing around, using the food as a shield from certain "death".

_"Spencer! Spencer! Freddie's hurt!"_ Sam screams at me.

The little trick! She's just going to trick me! I say, "Yeah right—"

_"I'm not kidding! Freddie's hurt!"_ Sam wails again, whipping my "shield" out of the way. My eyes widen at the sight of her. Her eyes were about to leap out of her head, and she was panting. She must have run here.

I have never seen Sam so terrified in my life, except for the time she and Carly nearly died. I have no choice but to drive her to the hospital. As if I could leave her there.

So, Freddie breaks his hand and leg, and that's pretty salty. But now I'm noticing that Carly will hardly ever leave his side.

Still, I didn't find anything weird with it until Carly told me she kissed Freddie. I think of Freddie, awkward Freddie, lips to lips with my sister. I'm sure people would expect feelings of anger or annoyance or protectiveness for my sister at this…but all I feel is _humor._

And judging by Sam's smirk, she sees it too.

I don't expect things to last between the two. I don't support the idea of Creddie. (I made up Creddie too). I reflect back on my past thoughts about it. I want Carly to have a nice boyfriend—someone who could take care of her. Surely Freddie is the perfect guy, no?

But…I guess I'm one to hold grudges. Somehow, Carly's uncaring rejections seemed even harsher than any cut or bruise that Sam could make on him. Outside pain is nothing on heartbreaks.

Both me and Sam were right. After I finished sobbing about Sam's victory in _Assassin_ and my horrible defeat, I learned that Freddie broke up with Carly.

No, I didn't learn it from Carly. In fact, she wasn't even a little bitter about it. She just came downstairs and threw away some cupcakes she had left over in her room. "They were getting stale anyway." She says.

I also invented the couple food idea. Oh, and couple colors. Carly's wearing both red and black (Creddie colors) but she throwing the cupcakes (Creddie food) away. For some reason, far beyond Carly's understanding, this was signaling the end of Creddie. I didn't know they broke up at the time, but she did. And yet she wasn't bothered.

Later that night, I was eating some left over spaghetti from the night before. It must be at least eleven o'clock. I wasn't expecting visitors, but hey, Sam and Freddie practically live here now. So it doesn't surprise me when Freddie walks in without knocking. He smiles. "Hey Spence."

"Hey," I say, watching him limp over to me. He's wearing a red striped shirt. Hmm. Striped. "Here to see Carly?"

"Nope." He replies. I blink in surprise. Remember, I didn't know that they broke up yet. He looks at me in surprise. "She didn't tell you?"

"No, what?" I ask.

"We broke up." He tells me.

_I knew it._ "Aw, I'm sorry. That's too bad." I say. "Why?"

Freddie thinks for a moment. "Don't you think it's kind of odd that she started liking me right after I got bashed by a truck?"

I stare at him. "Go on."

"Well, Sam told me that it could possibly be due to 'Hero Worship'. You know?" Freddie's eyes fix on some point in distance. Just like Sam does. "I guess…she had a point. Carly didn't seem too upset."

_You're right._ I stand up, abandoning my plate and begin paging through the pictures from my disposable camera. 12 in all, most of them being pictures of Carly and I. But there was one picture in there which was just Freddie and Sam. Sam was on Freddie's back, with her hands wrapped around his neck and her legs wrapped around his waist. And they were both smiling. Happily. Civilly.

"Carly's great, I know. But she can be kind of…slow with these things." I say, uncomfortably. How am I kidding? I think of Freddie and Sam, and how stupid they are for not seeing the connection. Carly's probably the smartest one on relationships of the group.

Wait, no. _I am._

"I know." Freddie looks off into space again.

"Will you be okay?" I ask him. Suddenly I get an idea. As I move away, I "incidentally" drop one of the pictures in my hand. Of course, it's the picture with Sam and Freddie on it. I turn away, but I could hear Freddie bending down and picking it up. I sneak one glance and see that he's studying the picture. I look away and grin.

"You know what?" Freddie says slowly. I turn to him and try to look as innocent as possible.

"Yes?"

He looks at the picture again. Then looks up and meets my eyes. "I think I'll be just fine."

And that's when it happens.

As Freddie limps away, I see him make a little hand-motion. Not really a hand-motion, more like a little shake of his wrist. The color catches my eye and I see what he's doing. There. On his wrist. There's the wristband he's wearing, and he shook it to get my attention.

A purple wristband.

He's wearing the red shirt, but he's wearing a purple wristband as well. And he just used it to get my attention.

I am now certain that Creddie has ended, and for good this time. As weeks pass, I see that Freddie's crush is gone. Gone. He never mentions it. Ever. And as his wounds heal, Carly makes no move to go back out with him. And he doesn't even care.

So if Creddie has ended…

I think of the picture, of the wristband.

Is Freddie free now to think of _other_ people?

Maybe a certain blonde one?


	8. Chapter 8: iGot A Hot Room, iGet Pranky

Spencer Shay.

Pro artist.

Detective.

Spy.

Is sitting back and watching the mice play.

Ever since Creddie ended, I think Seddie has noticed something. Almost…a disturbance in what they believe. What I mean by that…is that they are no longer assured that nothing will happen between them.

Carly always seemed to be the glue between the two. It makes sense. She would stop them from fighting all the time. They would work together when it came to helping Carly (like when she wanted to go to Briarwood). Without Carly, it seems that they would fall apart.

But it seems as if Carly doesn't need to be doing her job anymore. It's almost as if they could function by themselves now. They could handle themselves now.

Well, that is a huge step, at least in my opinion. It takes little things like that. But there's another little thing (well, not little…) that is affecting them.

What is that, I hear you ask?

…

_**I said I hear you ask.**_

…

Thank you :D

Anyway, it's that…something seems to be building up between the two. Something that is good for the sake of Seddie, but is confusing the two right out of their minds.

I don't know how to describe what is building up, but here's an example of it:

I, er, kinda screwed up. I ruined Carly's room. Her room…heh…burst into flames. I have a tendency to make things catch on fire.

You don't say?

Well, after it was beautifully created due to a miracle (or just an $80,000 bracelet…) everything was all fine and good. One of the details was a mini trampoline built into the floor, so you can literally "jump" into bed. Freddie demonstrated it, and that was all fine. And Sam did so as well before Freddie got off, landing on top of him.

Watching Sam, I could tell that in her mind, it was completely innocent. Maybe she did want to hurt Freddie a bit. But Freddie here was thinking something else.

Look, I'm a guy. Getting caught in these situations can be one of the most embarrassing things in the world. I remember, I was on a date with a girl (the first date with this particular one) and I wore sweatpants. That was one of the worst mistakes of my life. The sweatpants made it…noticeable. I wound up getting water overturned on my head and having to walk home.

Freddie never did have a poker face, but he managed to hide it well. But the one-second panicked look on his face said it all. Girls like Carly and Sam wouldn't have picked up on it, and I don't think Gibby did, either. But I did. I give him a look, and he refuses to meet my eyes for the rest of the day.

Although I _guess_ this is a step toward Seddie…it's kinda, um, how do I put this…dirty. There, that's the word. But I don't blame Freddie because he is a guy and we all get those moments.

So, like many things I have experienced, I go through an obsessive lapse. Well, this week, I'm obsessed with pranking. It goes deeper, from days of high school, but I won't get into it. We're here for Seddie, no?

So, I had installed an amazing prank for one of the two. A sheer glass wall that was basically invisible. Until you crashed into it and broke your nose, that is.

I did not anticipate both of them coming at once. What were they doing before that? Hanging out? I guess that further proves the point that they are good friends now.

Luckily, none of them bled out after smacking face-first into the glass. Then Sam whirls on me, her ice-blue eyes blazing.

"Dude, if I didn't have a little crush on you, you'd be falling for my baseball bat to your face bit!" She hisses.

In my haze of victory, I feel that connection in my brain failing. _Wait. Think._ What did she say?

She likes me? What?

"Little crush?" Carly echoes.

"Did he sign the contract or not?" Sam changes the subject.

Spam?

I'm sure it's just a little puppy-crush…but I hope she knows she knows she's almost 16 and I am 28.

I don't think Freddie knows. The look he shoots me is something that I don't even think I could comprehend at the moment. It was so quick, with the perfect amount of bitterness and confusion. He moves closer to Sam and looks at me again, this time with more confusion.

I give him a, _I-Have-No-Idea-What-She's-Talking-About-Bro_ look. Cause I don't.

Freddie isn't pissed about it later, though. Maybe a little shaken? I think that's why he was so willing to help get revenge for my pranking. That's just an assumption, but it's a pretty well-thought out one. At least in my opinion.

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Except yours is wrong.

So, back to Seddie. I continue to watch them grow closer, and quite honestly, I think that it finally has a chance. I watch as the two slowly ease to each other. I wonder what they consider themselves nowadays.

First it was enemies.

Then it was frenemies.

Then it was friends.

Then it was best friends.

I wonder if they think that "best friends" is too casual of a term for them now.

I think so.

I see the two talking on my couch, waiting for Carly to come downstairs, and think, _I wonder how they're feeling?_

I think of all of the romances I've been through in my life. Some were serious, and some were not. At all. Freddie is the opposite of me at that age. He's only had two girlfriends. One was Carly for two days and one was Valerie, who used him. Does she even count? Not sure.

Freddie is, like I said before, a hopeless romantic. That's just the way the boy is. He doesn't date unless he's sure about it. He waits. That's a good example for any guy to follow.

Sam is kind of the same way. Sam's afraid of one thing: rejection. Although she's pretty, I could see her abrasive side scaring off some guys. So she doesn't really go after guys. In fact, she's only had two boyfriends, too. Jonah and Pete. That's it.

I watch the two on my couch, smiling at each other, acting civil. That is, until Freddie does something minor and Sam goes vicious on him. It's a cycle. Repeated. Over and over. Almost like a game. A game they've been playing for years.

I wonder how much longer will pass before they stop the game.

Oh, and one more thing:

_**I lost the game.**_ Trollololol.


	9. Chapter 9: iStart A Fanwar

Spencer Shay.

Pro artist.

Detective.

Lawyer…sorta.

Spy.

Has come home and sees that Carly looks distressed.

Carly is my little sister and I'll always be here for her. So I must help her. "What's wrong?" I ask.

"A little disturbed, is all." She says, her voice trailing off.

"Why?" I ask.

"Uhm, well, it's easier to show you, I guess." Carly leads me to the computer, and clicks the internet. I watch as she types in "fanfiction dot net" into the search engine. It loads and I see her go to its own separate page, titled "iCarly".

"People write fanfiction about you guys?" I furrow my eyebrows together in confusion.

"Yes, they do, and it's creepy!" Carly clicks on something, and scrolls the rating down to "M". M for mature. What—

"They have the weirdest and most disturbing stories on here!" Carly half-wails. "Oh my God, read one!"

I click on the top one in the Mature Section. Carly presses her hands to her ears and closes her eyes, murmuring under her breath, "Dirty, dirty, dirty, dirty, dirty, dirty, dirty, dirty…" over and over again. I don't deny that Carly was a bit advanced with guys, and I'm sure she's done things with guys that would send me after them with a shotgun. But I have no proof, and it frustrates me. I'll catch her in the act eventually. Don't you worry.

The story was Creddie (Hey! They stole my catchy names!) and it was…how do I put this…not rated K for kids. I close the window and blink again and again to get the imagery out of my heads. God damn, that was awkward.

"Not just that, though." Carly says without removing her ears or opening her eyes. "They have more stories of Creddie, and Seddie, which is Sam and Freddie, and Spam, which is you and Sam, and it's just so horrible!"

Carly does have a quite innocent mind none-the-less, but I can see the dirty fanfics about her and her friends getting to her head. Poor thing.

"They're just fans," I tell Carly. "What do they know?" This calms her for now, but she can't get the imagery out of her head.

But I'm curious too. Later that night, I do log back on that site. My head is spinning now, and I'm pretty sure I can hear some girl screaming in my head, _Do I message him? Or should I not? He said he liked talking on Facebook, but I don't want to seem creepy. God he's cute. Very cute. My head is burning…_

Who was that? It wasn't Carly, or Sam. It sounded more like a cynical little girl who had nothing better to do than to write iCarly fanfics about Spencer, me, knowing about Seddie all along.

I read some of the Seddie fanfics, and I must say, they are all speculations of how they'll get together. I must ask; how will they get together? It must be at least somewhat ceremonial. Who knows how?

Oh, wait.

_**I do.**_

* * *

><p>It's not a game.<p>

It's a lifestyle.

We're on our way to Webicon, and I hardly care for Seddie at the moment again. All I can care about is defeating my enemy in a hardcore battle.

I won't get into the specifics of the battle, but I won…sorta. Well, until Carly and Sam and Freddie make me leave. Their urgent eyes tell me that something has happened, so I go along with it.

"So, what happened?" I ask.

"My God, if you thought our fans were crazy on that silly website…" Sam begins.

"It was ten times worse here." Freddie finishes.

"More so!" Sam adds.

"How?" I question.

"T-They were pushing over stuff, and…beating everyone up, and…" Carly rambles.

"And some guy kept yelling out Seddie over and over." Sam adds.

"Sounds…fun?" I say, but then I get an idea. As I drive the teens to the hotel we were going to stay at for the night, I remember the website. The idea keeps growing and growing until I can't wipe the smirk off my face. I go onto the website at around one in the morning, grinning and grinning. I make an account (the screenname? SsobasirecnepS. Read it backwards and you'll get it…) and go to the forum section.

Carly was right. It was full of obsessive fans. Then how come I feel some little person inside of me calling me a hypocrite for saying that?

I'm not a hypocrite!

And I also don't probe.

I create a new discussion and title it, _"You want to know the truth? Well come here then…"_

What was I doing? This was an awful idea, but I must do it. These fans spend so much time debating… They deserve a smidgen of truth. From an inside source. A really clever and handsome one too, who is also an artist and a detective and my God you know who I'm talking about.

Running my fingers through my shorter hair, I write the description, saying: _"This is from a top secret source. If you want the full truth on Seddie, meet me at Webicon."_

I go, with the night sky above me as I ride my motorcycle to Webicon. Since we were at a hotel, it wasn't too far. I arrive there, see that it is closed, but soon learn that it wasn't affecting anyone's appearance. All of them, all of the Seddie warriors, were crowded around the place. My eyes widen as I see that the crowd stretches on, and on, and on.

"Spencer! Spencer, is that you?" A girl with bleach blonde hair runs up to me. "It's Spencer from iCarly!"

The whole crowd lets out this sound that sounds like a mix of confusion and excitement. Then, I have only seconds to move out of the way, since the crowd moves towards me like a giant wave. I remember how Carly told me how they pretty much committed a felony on Adam. I didn't want to be their next victim.

"No! Stop!" I cough out roughly. "If you come closer, I won't say the truth!"

The crowd recoils as if there was a glass wall pressed up against them.

Two teens sneaked out of the crowd. The girl has fair skin and dark hair with blonde and red streaks running through it. She looked younger than Carly, Sam, and Freddie, but still in her teens. The other one was a guy, rather tall, with tan skin and long, dark black-brown hair. He was wearing a Jack Skellington hoodie, and almost immediately upon seeing that, I knew this kid was okay.

"Nice to meet you," The girl says, her voice scathing and cynical. My eyes widen as I recognize the voice that was in my head. She says, "Well, it's actually Spencer Shay, eh? Well, let's hear it."

"Yeh, it's liek twoo inn thzee mornin'." I think the guy says, but frankly, I'm unsure. The guy's voice was almost impossible to understand. It sounded…50% Gibberish, 25% Latin, and 25% Alienese.

"Ignore him." The girl rolls her eyes. "I dragged him along."

"Yu madde meh." The guy punches her in the shoulder, causing her to open her jaws in pain.

_"Seddie!"_ The guy who said "seddie" often screams out.

"Okay, okay." I stand up and address the crowd. "So you all came here for a specific reason, I'm sure."

"Tell us about Seddie!" A fan near the back screams out. His words were repeated over and over by several others.

_"Seddie!"_ The guy screams again.

"I will." I look at all of the Seddie warriors in front of me. "You may not believe me when I say this, but however…Sam and Freddie are much closer than you think."

The crowd lets out several screams and "Yes!"'s.

"How close?" Someone calls out.

_"Seddie!"_ The guy screams _yet again._

"Sercert bf an' gf?" The guy stutters out.

"Or like friends with benefits?" The girl asks.

"No!" I glare at her. I think of the dirty stories on the website. Surely FWB was among them? There was dirtiness among the Seddie relationship, if you think about the whole erection thing with Freddie. But not that extreme, I guess…

"It's more of a growing thing." I say. Then I stop. "Wait. I need you all to promise me something. Don't tell the iCarlies that I was here." I grin. "They're so ignorant; all three of them. It would be far better if this was a secret thing, no?"

The crowd let out murmurs of agreement. I don't know why I feel this way, but I'm glad I was stuck with the Seddie group. Except for the screaming guy, they sound rather…civiler, but not much. I mean, if Adam was Sam's boyfriend, would they tear up Adam like the Creddiers did? I'm not sure…

"So, will Seddie happen or not?" Someone asks.

"And when?" Someone else adds.

"Not sure. But it will happen." I chuckle again. "Like I said before, these three couldn't see it if I dangled it in front of their faces. They're blind." I look around the Seddie warriors. "But that isn't such a bad thing. Imagine their surprise." I readjust, smiling. "You see, it's almost like a game the two share. Some kind of twisted, sick thing that involves hitting and aggression."

The cynical girl rubs her shoulder and glances at the boy with the weird voice, eyes brimming.

"I wouldn't say they like the game. It's just all they've ever known. Since they were in 6th grade, when they met. It's how it is, and we can't control it. So we must be patient."

I wonder if I should tell them how they shared their first kiss already. But then their fanfiction will blow up with that fact and that'd ruin everything. Only me, Carly, and obviously Sam and Freddie know. So I keep my lips shut.

"They're so innocent. They'll never, ever figure out. Only something big would be cause for them to finally see it. And I feel as if that time is coming soon." I finish. I duck my head and I hear the excited clapping and applauding of the crowd.

_"Seddie!"_ The guy screams again. Finally, they all begin screaming _"Seddie!"_ over and over.

And I join them.


	10. Chapter 10: iOMG

Spencer Shay.

He would list his occupations but you know them by now.

Anyway, Spencer Shay is sensing that the end is near.

The end.

What kind of end, you ask?

The kind of end that you sense. Well, I sense it.

Like I said before, Seddie is growing tired of the game. The game they've played for too long. The Seddie game is such a hassle. I wonder how they've played it for so long. Because they have; they've played it since the moment they met, that one fateful day in sixth grade.

But they aren't invincible. Even Sam, as powerful as she is, and Freddie, as strong as the emotional scars have made him, still can't take that game for much longer. It's just not possible.

I can see the cracks. I'm not sure if anyone else can. But I, observant as I am, see the delicate little openings that they made themselves. The moments they let show only come at weak times, times where just a bit slips out of the cracks. They manage to keep calm while this happens, but the panic in their eyes gives it away.

Those poor little kids. I may be twenty-eight now, and they're sixteen, but they'll always be the plucky little sixth graders to me. Even as years pass, I will always see them this way. I can't help it.

But anyway, back to the game.

Sam, at first, seemed to be the strongest player of the game. She was the one who kept it going, really. If she let it slip, Freddie would follow, knowing that soon all of his physical bruises would disappear. But she needed the game. She needed it more than he did. She needed someone to constantly abuse. And Freddie happened to be that unlucky guy.

But maybe not. Sure, it was an awful position, but if it's all he's ever known, maybe it isn't so bad.

But what about Freddie? What does he think of the game?

If the game were to change, Freddie would definitely be confused. Like I said before, he can't handle change all too well. Even if the change was good…he wouldn't know how to deal. The poor boy could hardly handle it when he eats something different for breakfast than he does any other day. How could he handle the game disappearing?

Maybe they both hoped that the game would never end. But they could sense the end too. And they don't want to. They're trying to keep everything under control…

But they're only human.

* * *

><p>The real end of the game began around the beginning of March. I got a phone call from Carly at the hospital.<p>

"Sam pushed Freddie into a fire hydrant." Carly growls into the phone. "There's some bleeding, but his ear is intact. They aren't sure about hearing loss, though…"

I chuckle, because it isn't a surprise. I dismiss the accident. I'm used to it by now.

A few days later, Freddie storms into my apartment. Carly and Sam are in there, watching some kind of funny video on the computer.

Freddie has some kind of bandage wrapped around his head. And his facial expression sums up one word: _Rage._

He stands in front of Sam, seething. Sam just stares back. But not with the same bored, blank expression as usual. It was a concerned face. Her blue eyes were wide with worry, but then she tries to blink it away.

He glares at her. "Anything you'd like to say?"

"I-I…"

"You gave me _permanent_ear damage!" Freddie hisses.

"Freddie, look, I know—"

"I will _never_ be able to hear right out of this ear _ever again_!" Freddie is turning red now. "Do you have _anything_ to say for yourself?"

My eyes are wide as it is. Watching Freddie stand up for himself like this is really a shock. Sam could probably snap Freddie's spine with a twist of her wrist, but that wasn't occurring to Freddie. For a heartbeat, I thought that Freddie would spring at Sam, but fear and manners convinced him to stay upright.

Sam manages to keep her own cool. And she swallows and looks at Freddie.

"I'm sorry."

"See, you don't even—" Freddie begins, but then stops abruptly. He stares at Sam with his jaw dropped. "Wait, you're what?"

"I said I'm sorry." Sam repeats.

Freddie doesn't know what to say. He just stares at Sam bonkers, not knowing how to handle this. What? Sam was sorry?

Carly's eyes are about to pop out of her head too. She was just as confused as he was too.

But even I was a bit shocked. Not confused. Just shocked. Sam saying she was sorry? Wow…

I give her a questioning look since me and her seemed to be the only ones not in a daze. She gives me a _WTF_ look back, as if she didn't get my shock.

No longer was Sam confused about anything. I think she has it in her head. I think she knows what's happening here.

But she'll never tell.

* * *

><p>The behaviors increase. I begin to notice that's it's been a month since Freddie and Sam have even argued! As the days go on, I know for sure that the end is coming. Has it already ended? Has Sam simply got bored and stopped playing? Was it really that simple?<p>

It can't be. Because this is Sam and Freddie we're talking about, and nothing is easy about the two. Nothing.

So when this happens…I can't help but wonder if waiting for Seddie was a waste. If this is the long-awaited end…then nothing is going to happen. Nothing.

I'm almost ready for a sign to be made that says:

**Seddie Game: **From sixth grade year to sophomore year. RIP.

Bitter, I'm just trying to distract my disappointment with fixing a fire extinguisher when Carly comes downstairs. I expect Sam and Freddie to follow, but they don't. As Carly noms on a carrot…covered in whipped cream…I ask her on their whereabouts.

She tells me that they've gone to see a movie together. With Brad, their new intern. I pause and say, "Wait. They're going to see a movie together?"

"Yeah, weird, right?" Carly says.

"Yeah…" But it's not. Actually, hope strikes into my heart. Maybe…maybe it isn't the end.

But, I mean, Brad's there too. I can't help but wonder if Sam could be…using Brad? So she could be closer to Freddie?

…

No. No, it can't be. That's just me being a diehard Seddier.

But still. What if?

Later on, I have to go to the lock-in with them. I'm an experiment now. Might as well add that to my list of occupations. It would make a killer application.

So I'm trapped in a glass cage. I won't go into the specifics of the tortures inflicted on me, but it took a long time before I dared ate chowder again.

Apparently, the night of the lock-in was supposedly one of the most drama-enriched days that the iCarly crew has ever gone through…

And on that day, with my luck, I was forced into a tiny cage with terrible music, awful smells, and food that tries to kill you.

I think I noticed what was happening when I heard Freddie and Carly talking. I couldn't see anything through the glass, but they left the microphone on. They talked before, but I could hardly hear them over the sound of my own retching. Right now, there are no tortures to plague me at the moment.

They don't know I'm listening, but I am. So I strain my ears and listen to their convo.

"Did you talk to her?" That was Freddie's voice.

"Yes! And she wouldn't listen to a word I said." Carly says.

"What did you say?"

"I told her that I want her to have a nice boyfriend. She won't admit she loves Brad"—

Wait? Sam loves Brad? That's not right. They can see me, though, so I must keep a poker face.

— "but there's no other way. It has to be him! You sure the mood-app said she was in love?"

"Yeah, I'm sure. And there's no one she could love, other than Brad." Freddie pauses. "What about Spencer?"

"Pfft. She had a little crush on him, but nothing serious." Carly says.

Freddie was silent. Then he says, "…Gibby?"

"Did you even consider that, for even a moment?" Carly says drily.

"No…" Freddie admits.

"That's almost as crazy as if she liked…" Carly begins, but then stops abruptly.

"There's no way." Freddie says sharply. I could imagine him now, standing stiffly, almost glaring at Carly. "No way."

"I know." Carly says. "I'm just saying theories."

"Either way…" Freddie trails off. "Maybe it's not right to force Brad and Sam together. Until we know for sure."

"Freddie! It has to be him!"

"I know, but if she doesn't want to participate, then what's the point?"

"We'll crack her eventually. For now, just don't look for her. Let her figure it out for herself." Carly says. "Don't you want Sam and Brad to date?"

All I can hear is the steady sounds of Freddie's breathing.

"…So, you don't want me to look for her?" He finally says.

"No. Let her come to us. When she stops her little game and realizes that she wants to date Brad, she'll come crawling back to us."

I hear footsteps fading away.

I slide down the wall of my prison, my head whirling. What just happened? I tried to sort my thoughts, and figured out what I heard.

Okay. So they said Sam loves Brad.

What?

I don't get it. Except for when Freddie's with them, Sam and Brad never hang out at all. Could she really like him…? Is that why she kept hanging with them…?

But even with this evidence, I. Do. Not. Buy. It.

I think of how Freddie said that there was no way it could be him. Carly agreed easily.

No…no, no. Never say never. There was a possibility…

I want to get out of this cage. Now.

I begin to bang on the glass. "Come on!" I wail. "Let me out!"

"Spencer, we haven't finished the experiment yet!" Carly says into the microphone.

"Just let me—" I stop when I realize that Carly has shut off the microphone, leaving me alone in my thoughts.

* * *

><p>It's midnight, and the game has ended.<p>

The microphone is back on, and I hear Gibby shuffle into the room. "What the—" I hear him mutter under his breath.

I press my forehead to the glass. "What's wrong, Gib?"

Gibby goes to the microphone. "Sam, Freddie, and Carly are missing."

"What?" I knock on the glass. "Gibby, what happened?"

"I-I'm not sure." Gibby stutters. "I-I saw that Carly was gone, so I went to look for her, and she was screaming for Sam."

"Screaming for Sam?" I echo.

"Carly w-was in the courtyard. Sam left the lock-in." Gibby sounded confused. "I…I saw Freddie sneak away, too. He left when Carly wasn't looking. And then Carly was searching for them both, and now I have no idea where she is, either."

"Gibby, let me out of here." I say.

"But—"

"Gibby, this could be serious. Just let me out!" I say again.

Gibby slides the glass open, and I step into the outside world. "Can you get home?"

"Yeah, I can." Gibby says. "Where are you going?"

I grab my car keys. "I'm going to look for them."

I leap into my car and drive away. But the thing is, I don't know where to go. At all. Where could I find them?

And why did they leave?

Something happened. I feel this tight feeling in my chest, and it hurts. It hurts. It's like a… I can't explain it. It's some kind of…intuition. I don't get it…

I decide to go to my own apartment. Once I'm in my hallway, I look around. I decide that if something happened, no one will be in my loft. So I try knocking on Freddie's door.

No response. So I wander down the hallway, peeking around. I can't be too loud, or I'll wake someone up. Then I heard a voice, a very faint one, as if coming from a phone. I hear, _"Hey this is Sam. No one ever checks these messages, so just hang up."_

Then a beep.

"Sam, come on! This is the eighth time I called!" I freeze. It's Freddie's voice. I peek around the corner and I see at the end of the dark-lit hallway. His back is turned to me.

"I-I-I know something happened…something d-did happen. But you can't ignore me forever." He swallows, and he almost lets out a whimper. "J-Just call me back. You know I'll help with…whatever is happening."

He pauses, as if not knowing what to say. "Sam, you know I can help you. J-Just call me, okay? I-I just want to tell you som—" But then the message ends.

I watch in despair as Freddie falls to his knees. My eyes widen as he takes his hands and pulls at the dark hair on his head. He opens his mouth wide and I expect him to scream out loud. But instead, it comes out as a silent wail.

My God. So this is what happens when change happens to Freddie? Something…_big_happened. And I want to know. But I must comfort this boy in front of me. Maybe he'll tell.

"Freddie," I say softly. "Freddie."

His eyes, wild and feral, leap up to my face.

"Shh. It's okay." He kneels down beside me. "How've you been, Freddo?"

"I've been better." Freddie says drily. "A lot better."

"How you feeling?" I ask.

"I feel like I've been hit by a truck." Freddie grumbles. "And I have been before, so I know the feeling."

"Something really big must have made you this way." I muse.

Freddie looks at me. I can see some tears gathering in his eyes, not out of sadness, more out of confusion. "What do you know?" He asks.

"Not a thing." I chuckle. "You don't need to say it yet. Unless you want to."

"I would." He whispers. "If I knew what happened."

"Freddie," I begin. "I've tried to be there for you. And I have. And no matter what happens, I still will be." I look away. "But…but sometimes, you gotta help others. And you do, but you're in no mood to do anything at the moment. No matter how hung up you're feeling…someone's feeling worse."

Freddie lifts his head up. "I have to find Sam."

"Good luck, kid." Is the only thing I say. I watch as he leaps up and goes down the hallway, disappearing from view.

And I still have no idea what happened.


	11. Chapter 11: iLost My Mind

**(A/N: This chapter sums up the events of iLost My Mind. There will be one more chapter after this, explaining the events between iCan't Take It and iLove You. I probably won't have Spencer ponder the breakup because the breakup is horrible.)**

Spencer Shay.

Pro Artist.

Detective.

Lawyer.

Spy.

Experiment.

And I know it's premature, but I'll add it anyways:

Completely and utterly right.

Yes, it is premature. Because currently, it has been three days since the lock-in, and nothing has happened.

Carly had arrived home that night at around one o'clock. She was searching for Sam and Freddie with no success. I didn't tell her that I had seen Freddie that night, all broken up and confused. What would be the point?

She said to be that night, she says, "You aren't going to believe me…b-but I saw Sam kiss Freddie. I-I did."

I just stared at her with a casual gaze. "Wow."

"Wow? _Wow?_ That's all you have to say?" Carly's eyes were so wide, I thought they may seriously fall right out of her head. Wouldn't surprise me.

I decide to try and look at it through her point of view. This girl, Carly Shay, my little sister, is probably the most confused one of us all. Even more than Freddie.

It's easy to say that Carly is the most oblivious to the game. When I see Freddie and Sam fighting, I see two people trying to vent out mysterious frustrations towards each other as well as trying to hide hidden feelings. When Carly sees Freddie and Sam fighting, she sees Freddie and Sam fighting. That is all.

So, when Sam was revealed to have a crush on someone, Brad was an easy choice. He's new. He's friendly enough. But most of all, he's _not Freddie._ That was the winning proof. It had to be Brad, to her. It had to be.

And then she saw them kiss.

I'm sure that her first initial reaction was confusion. Like I said before, she was so sure it was Brad. But Sam's a difficult little thing; she'd never fall for someone so…_easy._ Oh, no, no. She isn't like Carly, who'd fall for anyone with a six-pack and nice hair.

But I think she had one more reaction, and this one hit her hard, deep inside. Something that would make her slow her pace until she sat down and thought it through. Yes, the emotion is clear on her face.

Betrayal.

Her two best friends. Closer to her than anyone, except me, obviously. Especially Sam. Best friends since 2nd grade. How…how could she hide such a big secret from her best friend? From Freddie, who she may even be closer to? From me?

I now know. It's because she had no choice.

Like I said before, it's now been three days since. And I haven't seen Freddie or Sam.

Freddie is here, though. He's right next door. I've seen a flash of short dark hair and striped polos swishing in and out of his door. He's so quick; whipping in and out of his apartment without a single thought as to confront me and Carly. In fact, he doesn't even know that Carly and I know.

We know where Freddie is, even if he hasn't ventured to us. But there's another problem.

Sam Puckett is missing.

No one knows where she is. She will not answer calls or texts or IMs or anything. Freddie vaguely answered Carly's texts, gruffly saying he was busy and cannot talk. But Sam…we have no idea where the girl is.

It's terrifying, but still. Sam Puckett is a big girl; she can take care of herself. Well, maybe. She can protect herself from anything physical. But not mental. And I'm starting to wonder if she's really okay.

So it's been three days, and things are tense. Carly is restless. She wants to confront Freddie but she also wants him to crawl to her.

Pfft. Women.

I'm trying to put these pants on. I remember reading in a Pop Culture magazine that skinny jeans are the next sexy. I think they squeeze in…places…but hey, I gotta look my best.

But Carly tells me they aren't my jeans. So while I'm trying to take them off, the man in question walks through my door.

He looks like normal Freddie. It's clear that he hasn't gotten much sleep recently. But then I see something about him, something that makes my eyebrows rise.

"Maybe you should take them off." Freddie murmurs, staring at me up and down. I know what he's saying. He needs to talk to Carly. So I stumble away, pretending I have the intention to take off the skin-tight material.

But I don't. Pfft, no way. I stay out of sight and listen closely.

"I'm getting really worried about Sam." That's Freddie's voice, which sounds tired and strained and over-all desperate. "It's been three days since—"

"Since you two kissed?"

Damn, Carly. I guess the nerves got to her.

"I-I…!"

"That's right! I saw it with both my eyes!"

Carly begins to attack him with an assortment of questions. I know he isn't listening, because his next reply is: "Do you have any fruit?" Smooth one. Freddie never did well under stress.

Freddie begins to say how desperately he has searched for the blonde, with no avail, I'm afraid. I peek around the corner and I see the two again. I watch as Freddie sucks in a weary breath, and then gets an idea. Something about tracking phones. Not surprising to see Freddie use his love of tech to help him out. Hasn't failed him yet.

Still, there's something new about Freddie that seems to be sealing the question already. I can't stop noticing it.

They do find Sam's location. "Troubled Waters Mental Hospital?" Carly gasps out-loud.

Well, I could imagine Sam in prison, but not a mental hospital.

But that's all Freddie and Carly need to hear before they're leaving the apartment with Gibby by their side. I hope Sam will someday realize that no matter how far away she runs, these three will always be biting at her heels. Especially Freddie. One of the things Carly told me, was that Freddie went to find Sam after Carly told her not to.

Freddie's devoted, I'll give him that. Even more so, he's got a bad habit of never giving up.

Even when Sam wants him to.

* * *

><p>I get humiliated by three highschool students. There isn't a thing wrong with hanging with a bunch of pretty ladies as well as eating fruit tarts. Nothing wrong…<p>

It doesn't offend me that much because now I'm back in Seddie mode. I ask them how it went. And where's Sam?

Sam is indeed at the mental hospital. And she wasn't exactly happy to see them. And now that Freddie convinced her to leave, they won't let her. She's stuck there since her mother is getting…laser hair removal.

From what part of her body?

"Poor Sam," Carly says sadly. Freddie sneaks a glance her way, and I see the emotion. Annoyance. Irritation. Sure, Sam is stuck in a mental hospital, but Freddie's in the same place. Mentally.

I want to talk to Sam as well. I already sort of talked to Freddie, but I need Sam's input. At the same time… I know exactly how Sam's feeling. Well, I get a general idea. Upset. Tense. And invariably alone. But staring at the dark-haired boy in front of me…

She's most definitely not alone. And her company is the one person she does _not_ want to talk to.

I need to hear how Freddie feels. When Carly and Gibby go to the computer and look at hotels that Pam Puckett (Sam's mother) may be staying at, I silently gesture Freddie forward. He looks up at me and I go up the stairs. And he follows.

Once we're in the iCarly studio hallway and out of earshot, I smirk. "You think you're so clever, don't you?"

"What?" Freddie blinks.

"Look at you. Feelin' all high and mighty, eh? Well, this is Sam we're talking about. She won't be swayed by things like…like…_these._"

"Spencer, what are you talking about?" Freddie half-wails.

I stare at him, and then burst into laughter. "Your hair."

"What about my hair?"

I cross my arms over my chest and grin. "You got it cut for Sam, didn't you?"

"What?" Freddie stammers. "I-I…"

"Don't deny it. I knew it." That was the detail I kept noticing. His hair is always a very mature looking comb-over. And now it's shorter and spiky and reminds me of my own hair. The little copier.

"…it looks nice, right?" Freddie stares at the ground.

"Sam'll be the judge of that." Is all I say. I lower my eyes and stare at him, up and down. "I asked you this a few days ago, but I'll ask again. How are you feeling?"

"This isn't about me." Freddie mutters. "It never was. So it doesn't matter."

"Are you serious?" I look at him, my eyes wide. In that instant, I don't see Freddie. I see someone much worse. He seemed so much older at that moment. His eyes are so wide and so empty…

Sam may be stuck in isolation somewhere, all alone and forced to dwell in her emotions. Freddie's in the same place, but I realize that he was worse. You know why? Because he's selfless. I'm not sure if he even stopped to think of himself. His only thoughts were to get Sam out of there. I don't think that Sam liking him as stroked his ego at all. It's just too stressful.

In the straightest way, Freddie may be one of the most amazing people I have ever met.

"Your feelings matter." I tell him. "And you know that."

"I know." Freddie says. "And we'll figure it out, once Sam's out of there."

"Freddie," I say softly. "What happened?"

"She admitted it." Freddie half-whispers.

"Admitted what?"

"That she likes me." Freddie raises his voice.

I watch him for a moment. He seems so small, so nervous…he might as well be the same 6th grader who I first met. He's grown up so much since then. But you couldn't tell at the moment.

"I tried talking to her. But…but she wants to forget everything, you know?" Freddie says softly. "I…I don't know what to do."

"You know why they won't ask you how you feel?" I say. "You know, Carly and Sam? You want to know why?"

Freddie stares at me. "Why?"

"Because they're _afraid_."

"They're afraid?" Freddie echoes. "Why?"

"They're girls, Freddie. They remember every single heartbreak inflicted on them. They don't want to ask you because they're afraid you'll hurt Sam." I tilt my head to one side.

"I would never do that." Freddie grits his teeth. "You know that."

"I know it. But they don't." I tell him.

Freddie looks away.

"Freddie," I begin. "I don't doubt your decision in this. I think you already have made up your mind. Just remember. You're an exceptional person. And no matter what happens, just remember who you are."

Freddie is silent for a moment. And when he speaks, his voice sounds tired and weary. "How do I prove it to them?"

"Dunno, Freddie. It usually takes a lot to impress Miss Samantha Puckett." I grin. "But I have a feeling that anything you do will blow her mind."

* * *

><p>My name is Spencer Shay, and I'm sexy and I know it.<p>

I look better than Pam Puckett herself.

But my disguise was blown by an old friend of mine. I always knew that I'd see Gary in a mental hospital someday. I take off the wig because it's uncomfortable but I see no reason to remove the fake boobs—ahem, I mean breasts, for that's offensive to some.

But anyway, I finally see her.

Sam Puckett.

She looks beat up, but in a different way. She looks like Sam and is acting like Sam but her eyes are betraying everything. She won't look at any of us straight in the eyes. She did look at me but her eyes were focused on something else. And my God, she has not turned her head towards Freddie the entire time.

She looks overly tense, like a cord that just keeps getting pulled and pulled and pulled. Anything will make her snap now.

Freddie thinks of the idea to do iCarly from the mental hospital. At first, I think it is all out of saving the show, but I'm Spencer Shay, for God's sake! I can see past those eyes. The boy's got something planned.

He's setting up his equipment. I see that he appears to be setting up his Pearphone to the thing. Why? What does he need it for?

Sam timidly steps over and plugs in one thing. Freddie looks up and sees her, and kind of just stares for a moment. He's thinking of something to say, but Sam's already walking away from him.

_Harsh,_ I wince silently. It's clear that Sam wants to forget everything. But he can't—it's just not in his nature. I remember his pestering towards Sam after Carly found out about their first kiss. He knew change was gonna happen, and he was trying to make it easy.

But nothing Sam ever does is easy.

iCarly starts. I sit, watching, knowing that I must look dazzling. iCarly _attempts_ to start out normally, but Carly just can't let go.

"Um, actually, we're gonna do something else first." Carly says. The panic on Sam and Freddie's faces begins to settle in. "Okay, so you fans of iCarly want to see Sam and Freddie get together."

Carly…

God damn it.

Freddie steps up. "Carly, I don't think it's a g—"

"Hush!" Carly whips around at him. There's nothing stopping her now. Maybe she's trying to make up for her mistakes. She was wrong about Brad, and tried to force him and Sam into something that they weren't. She still is trying to help her friend.

I watch on silently.

"Now, the problem is, Sam thinks it's insane for her to like Freddie." Carly says, her voice taking on a gentler tone.

"Because it is." Sam replies. In that moment, her tenseness fades away and I see what Sam really is. She's just a scared little girl. Her fate, right now, is in Freddie's hands. I wonder if he realizes this.

"But we want to hear from you." Carly says.

In the meantime after some patient interrupts (I kicked him. His pants don't work for anything) I look back at Freddie. He meets my eyes and I try to predict what he's gonna do. He just starts back, and the corner of his mouth tilts up a bit.

Devious little thing.

"But we want to hear from you, the fans of iCarly. So if you think Sam's insane for liking Freddie"—Sam pushes her bangs a little bit and looks self-conscious—"or not, just video chat us right now here at iCarly . com!" And with that, Carly trots away from the two and hooks up one of the web-viewers.

I would love to say how I'm feeling at the moment, but this is too tense.

Some girl named Wavy Becca comes on, and she agrees with Carly. Well, she does call Freddie hot which Carly disagrees with. Even now she still manages to sneak in some jibes about Freddie's appearance these days, but they don't affect him like it would, say, a few years ago.

Goofy Gilbert comes on, and I think that's the same guy I met when I told the crowd the truth about Seddie. Sure enough, he only has one word to say. Repeatedly.

Finally, I think after three stressful days—no wait, more than that. Sam's weird, civil behavior started after she pushed him into a fire hydrant. Anyway, it must have finally pushed the blonde over the edge. She is strong, but not enough for this. She can't do it.

"Okay, look. I don't care how many iCarly fans say I'm not insane for liking Freddie." She sounds like me at the moment, how I refused the positive reviews about my artwork after my idol broke my heart. But this isn't about me. This is about Seddie. She goes on, "I know that I'm cra—"

"Wait, wait, wait." That was Freddie. I turn my head and I see him staring at Sam. He's grinning now. "Let's take one more chat."

A spark of fear ignites in Sam's eyes. Everyone here can tell that it won't be a regular chat. "No, I don't wanna—"

"Just one more." Freddie insists. I look around and I see that almost everyone is afraid at the moment. But not me. Obviously.

The light in Freddie's eyes is wild, and he looks so much different than how he did when we talked yesterday. Instead of seeming nervous and fearful, an air of cockiness and confidence has taken over.

Sam tries to cover up her fear with an annoyed sigh, but it's clear that she's petrified beyond repair.

"Here, hold this." Freddie hands Carly his camera. At first, she doesn't want to take it.

"You be nice." Carly whispers. I raise my eyebrows. Is everyone here convinced that Freddie is going to destroy Sam here? Sure, he's got the cocky look, but I remember his fear for her and his concern for her yesterday. He cares about her, and a lot. But is it enough? Enough to balance out all the torture Sam inflicted on him?

Of course it is.

Freddie lifts up his Pearphone, and talks to the web audience. I'm not sure if anyone is breathing. "Hey, it's me, Freddie." He grins again. "So, uh, a lot of people have been talkin' about whether Sam and I should, you know, 'go out' with each other. And it's like everyone's wondering if Sam is crazy for wanting to."

He pauses for a second, and I can't hear a single breath being taken in.

"But no one asked _me_ how _I_feel."

Well, I know he isn't counting me, but that's okay. Because my opinion doesn't matter—at least not yet. I know he's referring to the two girls that are standing beside him.

Sam looks at him. "…We talked about it." She splutters out as smooth as possible. It's clear that she's going to snap now. She stands rigid, staring at Freddie as if he was holding a gun. In a way, he was. It could very well have the same effect.

"No, _you_ talked." There's the cockiness again. I think Freddie realizes that he has Sam wrapped around his finger. He decides what happens now. He could either make her life or send her to hell. It's his choice, now. "You told me how _you_ feel, while you ate a quesadilla."

I think he's having fun with it.

Sam is desperate to get out of this conversation, so she says to the camera how amazing the quesadillas are. Carly shushes her, and Sam stares at her in panic. She must think that everyone is against her now. She probably thinks she deserves it, for all of the pain and suffering she put everyone through. It's time for the long-awaited downfall of Samantha Joy Puckett, in front of the world.

I adjust my breasts, still staring at the scene in front of me.

"Anyway, yeah, it's important how Sam feels, but…" Freddie gives a little shrug, the grin still there. "How I feel is important too."

The taut cord, also known as Sam, has been stressed on far enough. It snaps.

"Okay, Benson. We get it." Sam begins. This is the girl's last time to save face in front of the internet. I'm not even sure if she wants to, now. She's too far gone. She just wants it over with.

Freddie moves the Pearphone away from his face and just stares at Sam.

"You want to humiliate me on the web in front of millions of people." Sam says roughly. She is clearly failing to stay strong. I would usually silently give out encouragement to her but I know I don't need to.

Freddie slowly places the Pearpad down, and turns around. The cockiness is gone and is now replaced with some kind of indescribable emotion. He starts to walk toward Sam.

Oh, I clearly see what's gonna happen.

But Sam doesn't. She still thinks that this is how and when she dies. When life suddenly loses meaning. She's had to fight through poverty and neglection all her life…but at what cost? Just so the one she loves can ruin her in front of the entire world? Where will she go, now? Where can she possibly run off to?

"Just go ahead and do it, I don't care." Yes you do. Freddie hasn't broken pace; he's taking small, swift steps toward her, and his face is still shining off the unknown emotion.

"Get back at me for all the mean things I've sa—"

And that's when it happens.

Fredward Benson, shy, awkward, bullied beyond repair…

Samantha Puckett, a fighter, lovingly vicious, a walking contradiction…

Finally do the thing that I've been waiting for.

Freddie kisses her, right then and there. The entire crowd lets out a happy squeal, which then of course turns to applause. I spot Carly there, still filming, with a smile on her face. Not a single trace of jealously.

But do I cheer?

Nah.

But why, you may ask?

Because there's no reason to. I saw this coming. I already vented out my excitement. I just watch them with a brilliant poker face, taking it all in.

Freddie's clearly satisfied with himself. He knows he made the right move. He could have humiliated her and basically have done whatever he wanted to with her, with the world as his audience. I think I finally know the expression he had. I may have truly loved some girl before, but that expression Freddie had doubled any feelings I've had for a woman by eighty million billion. I think at this moment, Freddie finally knows how he feels. And I think he's just fine with it.

Sam looks as if she's waiting for Freddie to suddenly laugh into her face and say how he couldn't believe she fell for it. Still nervous, still caught in that zone. She was so sure that he was going to get revenge. I think Freddie here surprised everyone here. Except me.

"…You mean that?" She chokes out, still having the layer of hardness over her. She doesn't break for many people. But the boy standing in front of her is an exception.

The cockiness is back, but undeniably mixed with a fresh wave of sweetness. "Mhm." I feel something warm and fuzzy fill my own chest. Freddie gives a little shrug of his shoulders and gives Sam an extremely warm look.

"So, I guess we're both insane."

Spencer Shay.

Pro Artist.

Detective.

Lawyer.

Spy.

Experiment.

Completely and utterly right.


	12. Chapter 12: Inbetween iCTI and iLY

**(A/N: Thank you to EVERYONE who read and reviewed this story. Thanks for sticking with Spencer till the very end XD I also organized the chapters so their titles say what episodes they come from.)**

Spencer Shay.

Pro Artist.

Detective.

Lawyer.

Spy.

Experiment.

Completely and utterly right.

Has finally stopped cringing.

It's not so hard anymore. Look, it's funny to admit this… I'm kinda surprised that I'm feeling this. I didn't expect _this_, and knowing how excellent of a predictor I am, this is a shock.

So, after the big kiss, the first Seddie kiss that I actually witnessed, you'd think I'd be on Cloud Nine. And I was—on the inside, of course. But about a few days later, it began to dawn on me. The truth. I think Sam was completely right with her wording.

"So, now what?"

I'm Spencer Shay, for God's sake! I saw Seddie when the two were _twelve years old._ What is that? How is that logical? It's not.

So, when the two are all lovey-dovey now… There's nothing left to do. My eyes are specially trained to see subliminal messages. But there are no more subliminal messages. No, if the two even so much as think of each other, _boom!_ They're making out. It's cringe-worthy, I must admit.

Well, it was at first. Now it's starting to mellow out. The "Honeymoon Phase" has finally begun to fade.

Their Honeymoon Phase was pret-ty rough. Not for them, obviously, but for the ones around them. Especially Carly.

The two couldn't keep their paws off each other. So every time Gibby or Carly mentioned them "making out", I couldn't help but suppress a sigh/groan/moan/Spencer Sound/whine. It's not that I was against couples who publically show affection, even though that was my excuse. It was because all the fun of Seddie has seemed to drain. There's no more sneaked glances, hidden moments, or over-all any secrecy. It's kind of sad.

But that's okay. In the beginning, it almost made me sick. Not because they were kissing left and right, it was because they weren't being themselves. Especially Sam. Holy Shi—is she wearing stripes? What is she _doing?_ Sure, she wore stripes that one day when she kissed Freddie, but that was when it _all_ began.

Maybe that's why I didn't like seeing the public affection. It just _wasn't_ Seddie.

I decided to not really express my opinions on it. I never have before. Just because they're together, doesn't mean that I have to actually say anything to them. It can be just like before, if I squint. To be honest, I like searching for hidden clues more than I do like watching Freddie shove his tongue into Sam's mouth.

But that's just me.

I was excited to see Ms. Benson's reaction. That's like watching Sam find out that ham was being recalled. Both would undoubtedly burst into flames.

Ms. Benson did later find out. And it's not fair—I even _lied_ for Seddie! How does that balance out? But I guess her and Gibby were in some secret alliance. Huh. Who woulda guessed?

I had stood by as Ms. Benson offered Freddie $100,000 to break up with Sam. I had watched as Freddie refused the money as well. And then the old Jewish tradition of the "disownment" by Ms. Benson.

Heh… Not gonna lie. I'd trade any girlfriend I've ever had for $100,000. Just sayin'.

I had continued to stand by and watch the relationship about to be ripped apart at the hands of Ms. Benson, Gibby, and… Carly. I stared at the computer screen as Carly ran upstairs, yeast in my hand, and watched as Freddie debates between breaking up with Sam or staying with the girl that just ruined N.E.R.D. camp for him.

Still, I had a poker face. So this is where Seddie ends.

But no. They managed to put it behind them. Freddie managed to get past it. With one final kiss, I felt a butterfly flutter up inside me. I get it now. Seddie may never be perfect—they will always have a way to disappoint my expectations—but I'm seeing what is supposed to be seen now. These are two very real people who are very much in love, and that's all good.

I have no reason to bother it. I have no reason to support it. But I do support it and I support it a lot. They are the real deal. They are canon. Finally.

With a spoonful of yeast in my mouth, I begin to cry.

* * *

><p>It is now the present <strong>(AN: I think iDSAF and iCTI all happened in the first few weeks after iOmg, since iLost My Mind happened only three days after it. So that means all of it must have happened in April, and iLove You must have happened in September on its premiere date, and I'm talking a lot, so let's just say this all happened somewhere in the summer.)** and I'm spooning a carton of milk. Pfft. Who needs women when you can have a carton full of a soothing white liquid? Heh.

In a sleeping daze, I suddenly hear something. And then another sound. Lifting my head off of my pillow, I hear some things being shifted around in my living room.

_Well then,_ I think. _I better whip out the heavy weaponry._ I then of course pull out my duster and get ready to beat some criminals.

I run out of my room, screaming, "HA!" expecting to see someone trying to steal my couch.

I instead see Carly. She appears to be looking through the cabinets. She opens one, moves around things without caring if it clicks or clacks, and then closing it, unsatisfied. She continues to do this, looking around the entire kitchen, not even noticing me.

I look at the clock, and it's _2:00 A.M._

I start to carefully walk toward her. "Carly?"

She still takes no notice of me. Now she's searching through papers on the table. What is she looking for?

"Carly?" I repeat.

Her head snaps up. I'm almost surprised by the rapid light in her eyes. What's the matter with her?

"Carly, what are you looking for?" I ask.

Now a wave of shame and embarrassment hits her eyes. She slowly begins to back up from the table, stiff as a board.

"S-Something's wrong." She stammers out.

"What's wrong?" I ask slowly. I take a step closer, and her eyes widen. She looks thin and trembling. Something is disturbing her, and I wanna find out what.

She disregards the question and continues to search. "I-I can't do that right now! I gotta find it!"

"Find what?" I ask. Sure, Carly has her weird moments once in a while, but nothing on this scale.

Something's wrong…

She continues to search frantically, and I repeat, "Find what? Carly, you can tell me."

She backs up, her eyes full of confusion now. She pauses, her lips slightly moving as if she's trying to come up with a logical response, but she gives up when she whispers, "I don't know."

"So, you don't know what you're searching for…?" I say doubtfully.

Carly's eyes fill with tears.

"Carly—" I begin.

She suddenly rushes up to me, and presses her face against my chest. Her dark hair was ruffled and tangled, as if she's been tossing and turning all night.

"It's over!" She screeches. "It's all over!"

For a second, I wonder if Carly is possessed. I've watched my fair share of demon movies. But she's not acting evil. She's acting incredibly…broken. My God, what happened to her?

"What's all over?" I say, with more force behind it. I need to know what's making my little sister this way.

Carly pulls her face back. Her porcelain skin was stained with tears. "This is going to sound stupid," She whispers, walking away from me, but then turning that into a pace. "Because it is. I have no right saying it…b-but it's true."

"Tell me." My voice sounds scratched with my own tears. I hate seeing people cry. And I don't think the Tickle Monster is going to help Carly right now.

Instead, Carly takes out a piece of paper. No, wait, it's a pack of sticky notes. She shoves it into my hands. "Look," She sobs. "Look at all of them!"

I look at the purple flipbook. I read the first little page, in which every little bit of writing room has been taken up. All over it was a list of dates, times, and locations. Over and over and over. I look at each page, and on each one was the same small font and info. Over and over, all different locations or different dates. Each page was filled up.

"…What is this?" I get out.

There was a wild light in Carly's eyes. "You wanna know?" Her voice sounds bitter.

"…I think so…"

Carly takes a deep breath. "It's every time Sam and Freddie have blown me off."

"What?" I raise my eyebrows. "Carly, why do you have this?"

"Look at me," Carly whispers.

Kay, I'm getting scared now.

"I'm nothing." Was all she says before more tears spill out of her eyes.

"What makes you say that?" I ask softly.

"You know, it never crossed my mind." Carly gives a bitter laugh. "When they kissed at Troubled Waters, I thought it was sweet. Who wouldn't think so? They are finally together—that's good, right?"

I just stare at her.

"But I never thought I'd feel this way. I'm not jealous or anything, but…" The light in Carly's eyes is twisted, rapid, feral. Her next whisper sounds like it's coming from some horror movie. _"They're mine."_

"What?" Is the only thing that comes out of my mouth, and it sounds twice as dumb as I hoped it wouldn't.

"They're _my_ friends." She hisses. "They don't belong to each other. They are mine. I'm the one who keeps them together!" Sobs are racking her skinny body, making her heave. "And just because they learned how to keep a relationship together—with my help, also—doesn't mean a thing. They can't just leave me." She's shouting now. "They are mine, and I swear, if anyone is going to try and change that, I'll…I'll…"

She collapses to her knees, her body overcome with sobs.

I don't think I've ever seen Carly like this. I don't think I've ever seen _anybody_ like this. This isn't Carly anymore. This is a broken girl that believes she has lost her friends. She wants her friends to be happy—and if that means Seddie, then so be it. But she just wants everything to be back to normal.

This whole dilemma sends me back a couple years ago, where Sam shook me awake in the night. She had told me that if Carly and Freddie started dating, then Sam would be the outcast of the group. I told her that was foolish—wasn't it? Even if Creddie happened, surely that wouldn't happen.

But it did, instead with Sam and Freddie, with Carly being on the other side. Maybe Sam would have been able to handle it better. She'd be torn, but she wouldn't be breaking down.

Or maybe she would be. Losing your friends to something you helped create must be pretty damn bitter.

Now that she's a bit more approachable, I walk up to Carly and crouch down beside her. I gently put my arms around her. "It's okay," I sooth. "It's okay."

"They're mine." She whispers. "They are."

"They always will be." I tell her softly. "Except, now it's easier to keep them in the same room."

"I've lost them." She heaves violently.

"Look at me." I cup her face so she's looking at me. Carly may be the most precious thing to me. And she always will be—she's the only family near me at the moment. She needs me at this moment.

Her tear-streaked eyes meet mine.

"They would never leave you." I say to her. "They are your friends. Just because they are closer now doesn't mean a thing. They just need some time alone. It'll wear off. Soon, it'll be back to normal. But maybe it'll be even better."

"I don't want them to break up." Carly murmurs. "I want them to be happy. But I don't want to lose them."

"You've done so much to keep them together." I tell her with a smile. "They'll always love you for that."

"I hope so." She murmurs.

"Don't worry, kid." I say. "Those two have a bond that no one can truly sever. This whole thing was inevitable—but that's okay. All we can do is trust that they know what comes first." I look up at the ceiling, at the stars that I hadn't bothered to take down. I did remove the moon, though. "They will never leave you. It's always been the three of you. Seddie or not, you three will live on."

* * *

><p>It's about time that I confronted the people in question. Since this whole thing started, I never got both of their point of views, right at once. I don't think I ever have, ever! And now that the Honeymoon stage has faded, then I'm free to ask them, right?<p>

I got a speech all whirled up, with years and years of frustration mixed in. They're up for a surprise.

I sent them texts to come over here and waited. Carly wasn't here, so it'll just be me and Seddie and a speech made in Heaven.

Where are they? They said they were going to Freddie's apartment earlier. What's taking them so long to—

Oh God.

They couldn't be…

Could they?

_Dear God, dear God, dear God, dear God,_ I think as I pace around the room. Maybe I should barge in. Just to be sure. But what if I catch them doing—no no no. They can't be. They're clean. Right?

T-They're only Juniors in highschool—they just became Juniors. Right? Right?

No no no no no no no no.

Finally the door opens, and the two mosey on inside in a casual way.

"Hey Spence." They say at once, sitting down on my couch.

I study the two with narrowed eyes. They look clean… Hmm. Maybe they didn't do…that. I hope. I really, really hope.

I go back to my speech.

I cross my arms over my chest and give a tiny smirk. "I thought I'd never see the day."

Freddie gives a little laugh. "What?"

"Oh, you know. Both of you do." I give a surprised face. "Oh, wait. You don't. None of you do."

They exchange confused looks. "Spencer, what are you doing?" Sam asks.

"Something that none of you could _ever_ comprehend." I sit beside Freddie and lean into his face. He moves away, looking embarrassed. "All the wittle children who thought they were so clever. Well, guess what, sweethearts? You two can't keep a secret."

Freddie looks over at Sam. "Do you have any idea what's going on?"

"No idea." Sam replies, her eyes fixed on me.

They deserve this. "Aww. What's wrong, you guys? Little confused?"

They both nod, their eyes wide.

I stand up and I point at the computer. "Remember that, Freddie?"

"What?" Freddie blinks.

"Remember? You were standing there, talking/drooling over Carly. And you, Sam"—I point at the door—"You know what you did?"

"I, uh…"

"You walked through that door as if you owned the place." I tell her. "And you saw whom?"

Sam just stares at me bonkers.

"You saw Freddie. Freddie, what did you do?" I turn to him.

"…uh…" They both look at me as if I was high.

"Sixth grade, Freddie. When Sam walked through the door, what did you do?" I repeat.

A glow of recognition awakes in his eyes. "I…I gave her a handshake."

"You sure did. Sam, what did you do?"

"I…uh, you know." She looks away. "I gave him a spitshake."

"That's right!" I sneer. "That is correct!"

They still think I'm crazy.

I point to the staircase. "And over there. I fell. But I heard what you two were saying. Sam was upset about Jonah, and Freddie, you were upset about Valerie. What did you say to Sam, Freddie?"

"…this was all a long time ago." Freddie argues.

"You said to her, you said, 'There are other ways to cure heartbreak'." I say. "But then I cockblocked the moment. My bad."

They look at each other.

"And over there." I say, pointing at the door. "Sam, you were upset about Missy. Freddie, what did you do to help Sam?"

"I…I gave her the School n' Sea thing…" Freddie says. "You know."

"You and Sam were friends, whether you admitted it or not." I say.

Freddie looks away, and Sam puts a hand on his shoulder.

"And look, here." I move over to the door and point at it again. "Over in Freddie's apartment. On his fire escape. What happened?"

Now they're getting it. "Spencer, what are you—"

"What happened?" I snap, before they can finish.

Freddie's voice lowered. "We kissed…ya know, the first time."

"Correct!" I smirk. I move over to the couch again, where they sat stiffly, and point over to the table in the kitchen. "What happened over there? You were all taped up. What happened?"

"Spencer, what are you doing?" Sam snaps. "Are you insane?"

_"Yes!"_ I shriek. "Answer the question! You were taped up. What happened? What did Carly do?"

"S-She asked us about the kiss." Freddie says. "She wanted details, n' stuff like that…"

"But you didn't tell her anything." I say. "You even refused to tell her your feelings towards the kiss." I grin now. Here comes a confession. "Then what?"

"Then what?" They look at each other. "Nothing, really?"

"Oh?" I chuckle, then point to the cabinet. "I heard it all."

"Heard wha—" Freddie cuts himself off. "No way."

_"Yes way!"_ I sneer, going back to the couch and going right in their faces. "That's right! Me, Spencer Shay, tricked you into tellin' me everything. Freddie, you wanted to talk about the kiss. And what did you say, Sam?"

Sam's face is bright red. "That we should just let it go back to the way it was." She mutters. "Because it was mutual. It was mutual then, and Carly finding out didn't change a thing."

"C-C-Correct." I turn to Freddie. "But that's not what you wanted, was it?"

"I don't know what I wanted at the time!" Freddie snaps. "What's the point of this?"

"Zoom forward, I'm in my bed." I say. "Sam, wha—"

"Spencer, don't." Sam hisses. "Don't say it."

"What?" Freddie says, bewildered.

"If you say anymore, I'll give you a royal fizzbin." Sam threatens.

I ignore her threat. I've come too far to get threatened like this. "I'm in bed. Sam, you were upset. Why?"

She attempts to spring at me, but there wasn't much force behind it, as Freddie manages to pull her back down.

"Sam, why were you upset?" Freddie asks. "What happened?"

Sam glares at me. "Just say it, then." She hisses. "You've already done enough."

"I get shaken awake in the middle of the night." I say. "Sam, why?"

"Because…" She mutters. "I…I saw you." She half-says to Freddie.

"Saw me doing what?" He asks.

"Apparently, Carly and Freddie were getting closer." I say in my storybook voice. "Only thing is, they had a little witness."

"Witness to what?" Freddie blinks.

"…the slow dance…" Sam's voice is barely audible. "You know."

Freddie's face pales. "Oh my God, Sam…you saw that? Why didn't you tell—"

"She was upset, and confided in me. Why did you confide in me, Sam?" I say.

Sam was close to snapping. "Cuz I thought…you know. That, um, if you guys dated, then…then what? I'd be just…you know, on the outside."

Freddie's eyes soften. "Sam, you know I'd never—"

"Save the gushy emotions for later. Story-time isn't over." I tell them. They look over at me. "So, Carly and Freddie date. They break up. Then what, Freddie?"

"What?" He blinks at me.

"I talked to you. What happened?"

"We just said how we'll have to get over it. And you asked if I'd be okay." His eyebrows furrow together. "You dropped a picture…" His facial expression turns to exasperation. "I bet you did that on purpose, too."

"Of course I did." I scoff. "But that's not all, though. Then what?"

"I…I knew what you were saying." He whispers. "Even if I didn't get it at the time. So I kinda, like, you know. Let you know that I knew."

"What?" Sam wasn't following.

"You shook your wristband. What color was that wristband, Freddie?" I ask.

"…it was purple, right? I think so…" He's trying to think.

"Oh, but isn't that what your fans consider the Seddie color to be?" I smirk.

They are probably wondering how I remember all this.

"So then what?" I say. "We remake Carly's room. Sam, you jumped on Freddie." I don't think I should repeat this because it's embarrassing but after all the waiting they put me through, they deserve it. "And what happened to you, Freddie?"

Freddie blushes beet red. It's a winning reaction. "Spencer, I don't think we should go over that…detail."

"What detail?" Sam asks. "I want to know!"

"No-oh, you don't." Freddie insists. "Spencer, please."

I begin to say, "You got a ere—"

"_Please."_ He half-begs to me.

I roll my eyes. "Fine. I guess I'll let it slide."

Sam turns to Freddie and says, "You're gonna tell me later."

In order to stop a different conversation, I say, "So, fast forward to when I was obsessed with pranking. I made you smack into a glass wall. Sam, what did you say to me?"

"That I liked you." She says without a blink. I guess that's because she's over me now. "You know, a little."

"Right. And how did you feel, Freddie?" I turn to him.

"Oh, you know…" He gives an embarrassed laugh. "Not so great."

"Would one say…_jealous?_"

Sam looks over at Freddie, her eyebrows raised suggestively. "Really?"

"Well, I dunno. Maybe. Maybe not. I kinda…didn't know what to think at the time." Freddie hangs his head.

"Well, that little episode after Sam jumped on you begs to differ—"

_"Spencer!"_

I roll my eyes. "So, then, we meet your crazy fans. Suddenly, all sorts of Seddie fanfiction started to pop up _right_ after Webicon. Why?"

They exchange a glance. "We don't know."

I smirk. "Because I talked to them."

"You talked to our fans?" Sam echoes.

"That's right. And with that, more Seddie shippers came." I clear my throat and readjust. "Now here comes the fun part."

A flash of fear enters both their eyes.

"Sam, Freddie, we all know that Sam started liking Freddie after she shoved him into a fire hydrant." I look at Sam. "When we didn't know, you simply apologized for it." I turn to Freddie. "Were you confused?"

"Well, obviously." He says.

"So then, we find out that apparently Sammy loves Brad." I look at them. "How did that make you guys feel?" I feel like a therapist.

"Pissed, because I didn't like him." Sam says.

I look at Freddie. "How about you?"

Freddie looks away. "I didn't want to help Carly." He mutters. "But Carly had a point. Brad was a good bet."

"You were so sure." I sneer. "So, so sure. But then it all just blew the brains right out of both your skulls."

"That's a way to put it…" Freddie mumbles.

"So, Sam, after revealing your feelings, you ran." I say.

"I know what I did." Sam mutters.

"You disappear. Freddie, I found you near my apartment. What did I say to you?"

"You basically told me to look for her." He says. "So I did. With no avail."

"Technically, yes, you did find her later." I say. I look at Sam. "There was nowhere for you to go. You, Samantha Puckett, for once in your entire life, were weak. Your fate was in someone else's hands." I tip my head to one side. "You didn't like that, did you?"

Sam doesn't reply, her bloody gaze saying it all.

"But you did, didn't you?" I say to Freddie.

"Not at first," He mutters. "I hated it. I don't like to see anyone that…vulnerable."

"But you were cocky at the end."

"Because I knew…" Freddie looks over at Sam. "H-How I was feeling."

An "aww" threatens to escape Sam's lips.

"Not yet!" I interrupt. I sit on the table and look at them with a smile. "And now we're here." I look around the room and say, "You know what's funny? Because while you two were bickering—no. While you two were living out all of those moments—every single one—you know what I saw?"

"What?" They look at me.

"I saw this." I point at them, the two people who were snuggled close together as they watched a mad-man ramble about their lives. "I saw this future. And you know what? I was right."

"So, wait." Sam holds her hands out. "Lemme get this straight. You basically thought that we were gonna get together this entire time?"

"Ever since you two met." I say softly. "I saw it. I knew it."

We're all quiet for a long time. Finally Freddie says, "How?"

"How what?"

"How did you see through all the bickering?" He asks plaintively.

I give him a look. "It's easy to see."

"No one else saw it, though." Sam points out.

"Well, I gotz skills." Is all I say. Then, I stand up and say, "Well, I must say, this has been an incredible journey. But it's not over yet."

Sam and Freddie exchange a glance. For once, the first time ever, I feel a pang of jealously. Sometimes I wish that there was someone in my life that I could look at that way. Someone that I'm sure I love. Why did these two teenagers find it before I did?

They begin to move towards the door.

"One more thing," I say.

They turn around. "What?"

I have a poker face for about five seconds, but then it breaks. "I knew it! I knew it!"

Sam chuckles. "Yeah. I guess you did."

"You know," Freddie says softly. "I never did, um, thank you. For talking to me about those things every once in a while. Even if they were proof towards… 'Seddie'." He makes quotations with his hands.

"Yeah…sorry I shook you awake." Sam says hastily.

"It's all good." I say softly. As they leave, I simply shake my head and give a little laugh. The speech was beautiful—it was so great to call them out on all of that. It's been buried for too long.

Even as things mellow down, I know things won't be the same. No matter what happens, nothing will ever go back to from before the game ended. No, the game wasn't _just_ ended—the game was _nuked._ No matter what path they take, it will always be something different.

What will happen, then? What road will they take? The story isn't over. Where will Seddie go now?

Dunno. But I guess I'll just lie here and not ponder about the future. There's no reason to. Not until I savor my rightness. Because, ladies and gentlemen, I was right about Seddie. I knew it. But I guess it's not a big deal. It doesn't matter to me. You know why?

I don't probe.

**(A/N: Well, I must say. This was my favorite iCarly story to write. I actually tried to hold off writing it so it could last longer. But that never works—I had all the parts played out in my head. But then when I wrote them, it didn't seem as great as it was in my head. I'm crazy, I know.**

**While I did enjoy writing it, I'm not sure if the quality was that good. Most of it seemed like mindless ranting throughout the fanfic rather than an actual story. But I stated in the first chapter that the POV will be shown through an unreliable narrator, so I guess this makes it okay.**

**Thank you to all that read. Reviews keep me going—even if it is a small "I like this; please keep going" I still get a thrill.**

**If, let's say, a Seddie episode comes along soon, then I might actually revisit this. I know there's an episode coming up soon called iBalls [Yes, I know, the title is hysterical. It stands for eyeballs, but we all know that's not what everyone thinks that first.] where Freddie hires a new tech producer and co-hosts with Sam because A.) Carly's gone for a little while due to Miranda's schedule and B.) He's not so nerdy anymore.**

**If there's a suggestive amount of Seddie in it, like, enough that you don't have to squint to look for hints, then maybe I could do a chapter about the break-up [something I hate] and then one about the new episode. But if there's hardly any Seddie, then forget it, it ain't worth it.**

**Well, thanks again for all the support. It was all really fun and I enjoyed where it took me. Spencer is so awesome. C: )**


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